Ep. 88 - Evolving & Ascending with Jennifer Sodini

The idea of coming back to love and forgiveness, and even when it's inconvenient, I believe in forgiving and loving everybody, even the ones that hurt you the most, because when you don't, all that really hurts is yourself. This is synchronous, this is synchronous, this is synchronous. This is synchronous, this is synchronous. Welcome to episode 88 of Synchronicity. My guest this week is Jen Soudini, and I'm going to get to Jen in just a second, and I know I normally say that. So this intro is going to be a little bit different than the ones you've heard, because I am burnt out, so I'm going to get a little personal here.

So if you want to skip ahead, I don't know how long this is going to be yet, but there is a point where the regular intro will start, and I will get to Jen, and also I want to apologize to Jen that this is happening during her intro, but you can skip ahead if you want to get right to the episode, which is fucking amazing, by the way. I do not want to downplay that one of my favorite episodes recorded not too long ago in the East Village. Jen has hooked up a lot of people, but I'm going to get to her. So let me tell you what's going on. I'm pretty much burnt the fuck out. That's the way I'll describe it.

I deal with a lot of anger issues in my life. I have a tremendous amount of trouble letting go of slights, injustices related to me. I'm not as benevolent to think that this is for all of the world, but I feel when I've been wronged in an objective sense, not just my own subjective, like, "Oh, this is only my perspective," but in a real objective sense, I have a really hard time of letting those things go. And I think a lot of people do, but in my particular case, it can consume me to a point where I wish horrible things upon people and their families, and just like the worst shit you could do as a person.

And what makes it even worse is I'm fully aware of the impact words and emotions have not only an actual reality as we perceive it, but from a metaphysical standpoint. I forget where I read it, but cursing someone or wishing someone or wishing someone was dead, like, "Carmically" is one of the worst things you can do, because that does have an impact on the interconnectedness of us all. So the other part of this, you know, I'm trying to tread the line here of being mindful and respectful of people who have wronged me, but a big part of this episode, and part of the reason besides the fact that I'm just burned out, and I don't think I can hide it, that I'm getting into it.

And this one is the quote you heard in the beginning of this from Jen is, "Forgiveness and love are really powerful tools for overcoming internal strife and external strife." But sometimes it's really hard to get to the place where you want to forgive. Sometimes someone just fucks you over so bad, or multiple people do, that you can't get to that place. And what can make it even all the more difficult, or at least it has in my case, is when some of these people are in this world we're talking about, if you're listening to this podcast, the spiritual world. I don't want to call it the self-help world, the consciousness sphere.

It creates an interesting dynamic with those of us who work in this industry behind the scenes, unfortunately, are all too familiar with. So it creates this really weird schism where like, you're angry and upset, it's consuming you when I say you are talking about me, and it's not healthy. And it reverberates into other aspects of my life, right? It certainly impacts my relationship with my wife, with my son, with my family, with my friends. I feel like I have a lot of anger that is hard to let go because I've been wronged. This also just is kind of a professional saga that I haven't pulled myself out of, right?

We all face the pressures of having to pay bills and support ourselves or a family. But when it's combined with some of these other things, it really can become kind of a tricky sticky point, and it has for me. So today, yesterday was kind of my breaking point. As some of you know, this is either the worst ad for it or the best ad for it. As you know, I've been working on this creative evolution thing, so I want to tell you how I got to this place, what was like the straw that broke the camel's back. So I've been working on this thing for the past few months, put a lot of energy, a lot of effort into it.

We had the beta run last week, and it went last week, last month in April, it started, went really well, got tremendous feedback. So I was really excited about launching it, launched it yesterday, sent it out to my email, sent it out to the mine pod list, had it go out, and it basically flopped. I mean, like total poopy doopy, no one got it yesterday, and I'm sure people will sign up. And truthfully, it's good. That's probably why this thing so much is it's not like I created something that sucks and it didn't do well, like this thing is actually good, like it really helped people, it helped me, and that's why I created it.

So that was kind of like this catalyst that just sent me into this death spiral of self doubt, failure, no confidence, like a shell of a human being, like I'm just beaten down to the point where it's like, I don't know what the fuck what is up. I'm saying things like, hey, you know, maybe it's just better to be a shitty person because it doesn't matter. You know, this is the quintessential dark knight of the soul. And to be honest, I'm still in it. And it's a very unfamiliar place for me. I'm sure as you can tell, I'm generally optimistic. And hat tip to Michael Donovan, who has been walking me through parts of this, he even sent me a little chart on how to deal with loss and there's like a little graph of the stages of it, of which I'm going through.

It's pretty funny. He's a good dude. And, you know, we were having a conversation yesterday and he was saying, you know, I feel like sometimes in this podcasting realm that people not are being phony, but they're not really talking about what's going on, like the serious things. And I countered like, you know, at least on my podcast, I'm having conversations with people. I'm engaged. It's what it is, whether it's fun, it's sad, it's moving, whatever it is, that's what it is, I think that's my podcast. But I do know what he's saying in terms of, you know, I have to do an intro each week. I do an outro.

It's accurately me. There's no stage persona, as I'm sure you can tell, but I'm not necessarily divulging into the personal stuff that's going on. So I'm doing this for a couple of reasons. One, it's just fucking cathartic. That's the only other way I can say it. And I do think it's important to just talk about this shit because I am at a point where I'm basically trying everything and that's been part of the problem. It feels like I've been trying so hard, whether it's professional, whether it's trying to overcome some internal issues, like anger, and it doesn't seem like shit is working. And I know that it is and I know that results don't come overnight or over months or sometimes even years, but it's still frustrating, right?

It's still disheartening at times. So that's what's going on. So if you want to get creative evolution, it'll make me feel a lot better, go to sinkpodcast.com/creativesummer. Do it if you want. I don't give a fuck. Really at this point, I'm happy I built the thing. I'm proud I built it. It's really cool. It's not about it. Really what I'm learning about it, this product I created, this course is that it got me to this place now where I am so burnt out and just like, ugh, I got nothing. Nothing left. And I know that's not true that I'm kind of happy and grateful that it did, because this is a point I think I needed to hit, because I really have just felt like I've been overextending myself to such a ridiculous degree in so many relationships in the professional world that like I'm just so fucking burnt.

That's the only, that's really my takeaway. I'm sure in a subsequent episode, I will have a happier, you know, point and there's positive shit in my life. Kind of sound like a mopie doodoo head. And I don't, you know, I think there's an aspect of depression that's creeping in here, but I also am happy in between this stuff. But yeah, it's a motherfucker. So if you're going out through, if you're going through anything like this or have gone through something like this, I'm there with you. You know, it may be great to listen to podcasts and people be like, oh, they got it all figured out. They know exactly what's going on.

I will remind you, I do not have it all figured out. I do not have my own shit figured out, which is primarily why I try to talk to people on this show and in life about their perspectives and what they've learned. I ask practical tips because I'm genuinely looking for them. So just a reminder, when you're listening to people on podcasts or teachers or whoever, they're people too. And the way people sometimes present themselves may not be what's actually going on. So for that reason, I'm lifting the veil here, I'm showing you what's actually going on. This is how I actually am and maybe I'll do it again in another 88 episodes.

Who knows? I don't, you know, it'll be a mopie guy. Okay, that's done. Let's get to this episode with Jen. Oh, yeah. Jen, I really fucked you over on this one. I got this is like a slow ride downwards until we get here. But I would not do Jen such a disservice by not talking about how awesome she is. She is the founder and creator of Evolve and Ascend, a wonderful platform where new ideas meet ancient wisdom, hardly does it justice in terms of what it is. She's incredible creator, creative mind, networker, and she's also just hooked up so many amazing guests. I've known her for like two months now.

You've heard me mention her a few times, incredibly, incredibly nice, generous, cool, directed me with Jerry Brown, Gerard Powell, Sarah Potter, all of these people who have just been lovely and some of my favorite guests on the show. And it was excellent to be able to sit down with her in person and have this conversation. She had just gotten back from her retreat in Costa Rica, Rythmia, right, Gerard Powell. He was the guest last week and it was pretty intense for her and you'll hear her talk about it in this episode, you can still hear her the reverberations of that experience. She was very much talking about humility, forgiveness, love, unconditional love.

And I think those are the things that ultimately keep me going. Even if I can't access the level of forgiveness or love that I want to at times and I turn into a hateful, bitter, little man, being reminded that those things are there and I'll add in gratitude as well. When you've gone through your temper tantrums, like in my case, it is pleasant to remember that those things exist and are there as tools and resources for us to access. The other thing I want to talk about here is like, this is all within us. You don't have to get any of this stuff from someone else. It can help. There's not like a reason not to necessarily.

But if you're not ultimately coming to the conclusions that you are the creator and destroyer of what you perceive and what is around you, truthfully, you're going to be railing against things like I have for the past couple of days. So don't do that. Listen to Jen. She's incredibly wise. Like I said, evolve and ascend. She's just really, really cool. I'm going to have links to all of her stuff on sinkpodcast.com and mindpodnetwork.com. I'm getting her to join MindPod Network. She has a podcast called Liberation Frequency. I'm getting her on MindPod Network, whether it's by force or not. She knows what I'm talking about.

Truly, this is an excellent, excellent episode. If you need an antidote to my depressing intro of how burnt out I am, this is it. It's coming right up. So there you go. You did it. That's it. Thank you to everyone who's contributed. Honestly, if you contributed, you're fucking awesome. If you haven't, whatever. I would appreciate it if you did, but you don't have to. The ratings and reviews are coming in. I very much appreciate it. We're about to crack 100. I think we're at 99. I don't know any of that shit means. I'll tell you this. Listen, let me tell you the other thing. I didn't mention this in terms of being burnt out.

I'm on the fucking broke. I got no money right now. I got none. I got responsibilities and I don't have money. One weird thing that's been happening is as I have less and less money, my podcast that's continued to go up and up and up, which is just the weirdest fucking thing. I don't know what message that's trying to tell me. But last month was record month for synchronicity. That's fucking awesome. This month, by all indications, will be another record. So if just, I don't know, 1% of you listening gave $1, I'd be a rich man and I would have to stop the mopiac, right? I'm kidding, of course. But really, if you can support free podcasts that you enjoyed, that's fucking cool.

If not, don't worry about it. I don't know. I'm so raw. I'm holding nothing back in this one. You're getting the full spiel. Okay. Without further ado, I'm so sorry, Jen, but this is your. This is your intro, but it is. Without further ado, here is Jennifer Souti. Okay, we're live. Hello. Uh, Jen, thank you for doing this first and foremost. I know we tried to do it before in this very spot, but then we saw Alex and, uh, and, uh, uh, Moody, Raymond Moody, which is really cool. Uh, but let's start here because we were just talking about it. We had a good hour to catch up beforehand, which is lovely.

Let's start with Rythmia. Yes. Because by the time this comes out, um, Gerard's episode will have come out. So people will know if they've listened to that, what that's about. But you were down there. Can you explain how you found yourself down there and what happened and what has happened since? Amazing. Well, I found myself there after a series of synchronicities. Nice. Yes. So it's very appropriate. Um, a couple of weeks ago, a friend of mine had introduced me to Brandy Alessandra, who is the co-founder of Rythmia. Uh, he put us in touch via email so that we could get along great and, you know, we did.

And Brandy had a plan to come to psychedelic science in Oakland, which I was attending. Um, we met in person. It was like meeting my sister that I just was like, oh, well, okay, here you are. Right. So we totally vibed. And she said, okay, well, you need to come down and experience Rythmia. We're going to bring you down. We want you to cover it for Evolve and Ascend, um, you're coming. Right. In Costa Rica. In Costa Rica. Yeah. Yeah. So Rythmia is the world's first medically licensed plant medicine facility, which it was just incredible. It's just like how this exists in the world, they would love to come here.

Um, so I came down to Rythmia to write a story for Evolve and Ascend. And it was just completely life changing. Yeah. And the synchronicity of how I got there too is just so funny because when I started Evolve and Ascend four years ago, I started it after going down to Costa Rica and doing ayahuasca. So, you know, I had gotten out of a relationship and I decided I wanted to treat myself to a psychedelic eat, pray, love, really smart moves by you. Yes. And, um, you know, around that time I'd really gotten into Daniel Pinchback's work and the revolver, they were hosting a retreat down in Costa Rica.

So I went down there and actually met Daniel, had life changing experience with ayahuasca, came back, started Evolve and Ascend. So it would be coming. And that was, was that your first ayahuasca experience? Mm hmm. Yeah. So that first experience was like, I, I describe it as like stepping into this like warm cosmic bath of all that is. So you know, I was really lucky. I didn't get sick. I didn't have the purge. Really? Yeah. It was possible. I didn't either. I felt so great flow. I was like, whoa. Wait. Divinely. And you had like a full experience? Full experience. What was it like? So when it first started coming on, you just felt this like tingle, almost like, um, you know how that feeling that you get when like you cross your legs and your legs starts to fall asleep?

Yes. Sure. But it's like this vibration. This is vibration kind of flowing all over your head. Does it feel warm, ish? Yes. Like a, like a warm bath. Okay. Um, and then there's this like vibration of noise. So it, Terrence McKenna talks about it, but it's just this like, like, like low vibrating tone. It almost feels like you're kind of like breaking through the matrix. Right. And then you're completely out of your body and it's like stepping into a lucid dream. And the language doesn't do this experience justice because there's no way to explain the colors, the dimensions, the what you see. Right.

Um, I mean, Alex, great, this is the best job of kind of capturing a screenshot of that. Right. But the first two experiences I had with it weren't just this divine bliss of just like, everything's connected, everything's good. This is why you're here. This is what it means. And it's all, I mean, with every psychedelic experience I've had, it all brings me back to like love and forgiveness. Awesome. And I'm glad to hear that. Me too. Yeah. Literally every single one. Everyone. Yeah. Yeah. Love and forgive never deviates from that. Yeah. Even when I'm kind of being an asshole. Totally. My ego takes over and it's like love and forgive.

How many times did you do ayahuasca on the first, twice, twice, twice, over how many days? 10. 10 days. So we had, it was a 10 day experience. So when we got there, it was kind of like just integrating, getting settled. And then there were three, it's called a sunrise renewal ceremony. So basically you're taking this plant, which is, has an admixture in it that makes you throw up. So every morning before sunrise, we were just taking this tea that basically makes you puke. And that did make you throw up. No, that did. Okay. Because it was meant to. I just want to know if you're a super human who doesn't throw up or we'll get into what happened at rhythmia.

Okay. I read about it. Yes. But I will, we'll look to hear about it. Okay. So yeah. So this plant's like rota-ruder for like that energy, I guess. That's awesome. So you know, the first couple of days we're doing these sunrise renewal ceremonies and I'm sitting, the men and women sit on different sides of the ceremony space and I'm sitting with like all the women that I'm with and we're just puking. How many people? I think we have like 15 people. Cool. Around that. Cool. Um, we're just puking together and it's not uncomfortable. So we're like laughing like, why does this feel so good? This is weird.

I feel like I'm like doing my body justice, but in Shimano culture, they believe that the purge is a healthy thing, you know, it's, it's letting go of- It makes sense. Yeah. Sometimes it does feel like when you're too drunk and you throw up, you feel good afterwards. Yeah. Totally. And it's like that same experience really. Wow. This is good. Yeah. So basically those ceremonies and then we had, um, uh, ayahuasca ceremony day. So that day you fast all day and then in the evening we open up the space and then, you know, they serve the medicine and you journey. So I had the first journey, which was like, like I said, this warm cosmic bath of divine bliss.

Right. And then we had a day off. Then there was a day of fasting ayahuasca, beautiful experience again. And then the third ceremony I couldn't participate because in the tradition of those particular shaman, they're called the sequoia. They believe that one woman is on her period. Her vibration is at such a high level that it actually like disrupts the geometry of the ceremony space. Right. So I sat out, but it was just fine because I got everything that I created. Right. Right. Right. Sure. Sure. Sure. Sure. Sure. Sure. Sure. Sure. So, you know, I came back, like I said, started evolving ascend and, you know, it's been a wild few years.

And so I want to connect all of these thoughts, explain of what, well, let me first tell you you know, run various social pages and have worked with clients like you have in that space before. So I see stuff that's going on and I see who's sharing and the types of people amongst my friends who I know are like, you know, tuned into this stuff and I would see this stuff. And I was like, this is really like, this is good. Like there's a lot of shit out there. There's a lot of not good stuff, but there's like something driving this behind this that like makes a lot of sense. And this is from Facebook, primarily this is where I found it.

And you know, the more I tuned in, it was like, holy shit. So then I found out who you were. I think I reached out. I was like, well, I haven't, but this is months ago. And then we connected and obviously it's been wonderful since then, but explain like in your mind, like, so you came back from this first trip literally and figuratively and started it. Like what was your intention? Was there, was there a strategy behind it? Was it just like, I'm going to do this? Like what? That strategy I had mostly intention. So growing up, you know, I was exposed to a lot of esoteric material at a young age.

So my grandmother was like a free thinker. Her mother was in the golden or the Eastern Star, which is a female sect of Freemasonry. And she just was like really into the occult and esoteric and exposed it to me at a young age. And my grandmother really had this vendetta against the Catholic church. And she had in her will that if any of us went to Catholic college that we wouldn't have our education paid for any Catholic or cult-like institution is the wording she used. And she passed away when I was 12. But you know, she left me the gift of teaching me oracle cards and all the stuff that, you know, I've talked about in other interviews, but you know, from like 12 to 13, I was really into like Wicca and just looking beyond the veil, but I was a weird kid, you know, like growing up in this town that I grew up in was like a wasp nest, you know, and then here I am.

And I'm like, I think there's more to reality and they're like, you're crazy. So you know, it was hard because I got like made fun of and picked on for kind of thinking the way I thought. So fast forward to high school, I repressed it, always was a part of me, but I didn't really talk about it. It was like, I closeted it and then were you doing psychedelic? No. Right. No, psychedelic actually may help me make sense of all the things that I was already feeling. Well, I mean, I will say I say no ship because they also helped for me as well. Yeah, but I mean, they can, they certainly can, but they can also be, you know, difficult for people and confuse them.

But yeah, okay. Yeah. That makes sense. But yeah, and then I talked about that like already just like kind of being a very naturally intuitive person that would dream things that come true. Like, this is just like all I've ever known, you know, so it's just, yeah, exactly. I like that wording. So then fast forward again, I'm in my 20, I'm like 25 and my ex and I are working for a pop culture blog. So I was like head of this really viral pop culture blog for a reality star. Are you allowed to name? One day. You don't have to. One day I'll rule. One day. So I get it. Save that for the book. Yeah.

But he was sweet, but basically I was like the front of his pop culture blog and around that time was the whole like stuff around like 2012 and the mind calendar. Yeah. And I was like, this is crazy. And I went down this like Mayan rabbit, Mayan calendar rabbit hole. Did you read pinch bank? Then? Yes. Fuck yeah. That book really did a number on me in a very positive way. Totally. So January is brilliant too. He's a brilliant mind. Yes. Yes. But you know, I, my ex was very zeros and ones and not really into spirituality or anything, but we both kind of agreed on the Terrence McKenna stuff. So around that time we decided to grow our own mushrooms and we were like, you know what?

If this 2012 thing's happening, we want to like dive deep and see what's like deep with me beyond the veil. Yeah, I get it. So he and I grew mushrooms and decided that around December 21st, we were going to have like the ultimate trip. Nice. So we each took our chair and he went downstairs. I went upstairs and I had this completely like revelatory, I call it my own apocalypse because it was this revelation of all that I wasn't and all that I am and just brought me to like love and forgiveness. Totally. It made me remember like, what are you doing working in this pop culture blog? You are this creative being, you have this like knowledge of things.

You need to explore this side of yourself. So pretty soon after that experience, he quit. I quit. He went deep into Bitcoin and I went deep down the rabbit hole and I kept looking for blogs that had the kind of content that I loved and grew up on and they all were awful. They all were like either like geo city site that you couldn't. Well, that's why I say like these things are notoriously terrible and I know people who are running, really there's good information on some of these sites too, but they just look like you're insane, like you're the unibomber and you build the website and that's what it looks like.

And it's like okay. So bad. Purple background, yellow, wetter, font. Don't get me started on fonts, but I just like there's nothing that like and that was balanced. So it's either like reptiles and whatever conspiracy or like too fluffy. So I was like, I want to create something. So that was like around the time I went down and then came back and I was thinking about what to name it and in 2007 after a breakup, I got the word evolved tattooed on me. My dad had died the year prior, I had gone through a bad time and I was like, this is a really good mantra. So then around 2012, I got a sentence tattooed on my other wrist and thank you for names.

I'm like, well, it would be good. I didn't know that. I'm like a part of my journey. Yeah, I never really talked about that. Yeah. So it's like evolve and ascend. I'm like, oh shit. I didn't even realize this is really good. So then I started it on Squarespace with no game plan whatsoever. I'm like, I don't know what I'm going to do. I just want this to exist. 2013. Very cool. And my whole tagline for it is where the library of Alexandria meets Andy Warhol's factory. That's awesome. I just wanted to curate the content that I love and have it driven by art. And what happened from then to now is truly a testament of following your heart.

Because I heard this quote that I love and it's like, there's nothing more powerful than a naive dream. And that was me. Because it's like, all right, I worked in pop culture, I know how to blog. Now what do I, how can I do this? Yeah. And I had no idea, but I did it. But that's how, I mean, that's the secret because that's what everyone really does. Some people, blessed they are, have the full confidence before, but that's really a myth for most people. Like you do take that jump just having kind of audacity to think that you might be able to do it and you should do it. I mean, that's, but that's fucking awesome.

And look at, I mean, look at the circle of events, I mean, since then, that's so fucking cool. I know. That's really awesome. It's really like divine synchronicity. Yeah. And, you know, in four years, what's happened to kind of come full circle and it's like, I just, I pay so much homage to Daniel because of his work and it was such, it opened a door for me. Yes. It was doors for me too. There's an analogy I still use where he was talking about a paradigm shift and I thought it was just such a great analogy, it was that, you know, our culture was like a car that was driving on the highway going like 65 miles per hour and the engine died.

So it's not like when the engine dies, the car comes to an immediate stop. It's still close, but you know, if you're driving that like, oh, the engine died, this thing is eventually going to come to a stop and we're going to have to get off into a new car. And that's what he described kind of what has been happening in 2012 was the shifting point. The first thing is, I described you off air, an experience I had about 2003, 2004. I've been doing psychedelics since about '98 when I was 15. So at that point for a long time, I got some downloads and one of them was that 2012 wasn't going to be a physical apocalypse.

It wasn't going to be some devastating, because people really, you know, people forget this now. We're in 2017, but like, people are legit like, they thought that it was. This was a big, this wasn't like Y2K, which like people kind of knew was bullshit. This was like a big deal for a lot of people. There was a Mayan calendar that is very sophisticated and has something to do and it lined up with a lot of other Vedic things. There's a lot of stuff going on, but the downloads I was getting was big. They were basically like, listen, this is going to be a complete shift in consciousness. It is going to completely change the way that the world works from like an atomic quantum level, and I don't know what this shit means.

But I remember getting enough kind of whatever you want to call it, insight into what was going on and then seeing that play out over the years to where we are now five years after this 2012 thing and seeing like, I don't know if people get it yet, but like the distance between thought and matter is as small as it's been since I've been alive. I don't know what else to say about that, but I just know that like I remember having an idea like, you know, how it doesn't feel like we've known each other like a little bit longer than a couple of months. Completely. So it's a very interesting time. So I think that's very important that you point out that Daniel's book there.

I mean, it's something I actually don't reference quite a bit. I gave it to my friend. It was something after I read it, which is when I like a book, I gave it to someone really pivotal in terms of putting a lot of these things in perspective and just very well researched and planned and thought out. So that's, I'm glad you brought that out. That's interesting. And that's interesting. There you go. Exactly. Okay. So Evolve in a sense starts. You have started this thing. It's got its own trajectory, whether you know it or not. Now let's, let's fast forward it through the trials and tribulations.

I'm sure with growing an online media brand. And then getting goxed on now goxed. No, we would be totally remiss if we didn't talk about on the day where Bitcoin hit. It's highest point ever historic highs. It was at 2200 earlier in the day. I love Bitcoin. I think I said this last time you were here with Sarah and Abby that I had YouTube videos of myself talking about how revolutionary Bitcoin was. And then I deleted them because I was like, this is so corny. And they actually got views because people are interested. I love Bitcoin. I think it's amazing. I think it's the idea behind cryptocurrencies and the blockchain and all this stuff is great.

You have a very significant connection to Bitcoin and now Ethereum. We were talking about today, walk me through this whole another thing coming full circle. Yeah. So when I started evolving a cent, I'd basically put all my money into Bitcoin because my axe who's brilliant, he was like Bitcoin, Bitcoin, Bitcoin. Yeah. I heard about Bitcoin for the year. I love to hear that he's brilliant because I was just fucking, I think it was a good idea. Well, he's brilliant. Like he started programming when he was like eight years old and he's Russian. So like. Awesome. Yeah. So I, I made the mistake of like putting everything into Mount Gox and I was trading and I was doing really well and I was like, oh, awesome, I'm going to use this.

I'm going to put it to fund, evolve and ascend. This is my game plan. I'm going to take the year to develop it. So that was my plan. I had no other talk about naive dream. So I had no other backup. And then, you know, overnight, I went to log into my Mount Gox account and I got locked out and I'm like, what the fuck? Where's my money? Oh my God. What am I going to do? So literally when, you know, I have this game plan that there's nothing else that I'm going to do other than this. And then like overnight I lose everything I have, I was like, all right, well, I'm still doing this. So I'm going to do whatever I need to do to make this happen.

So like I literally was like, I'm going to bartend. I'm going to freelance. I'm going to do everything possible to make it work. Nice. So it, you know, I, I feel so lucky that it worked as hard as hell. How long do you think, how long was the distance from that point of getting locked out of Mount Gox? I remember that happening because I didn't, wasn't using Mount Gox at that point. I bought mine through local. It's like two years. So like, uh, 2014 is when it happened and really like 2016, far your way back up. Yes. Yeah, man. And it's been this like upward trajectory. And you know, my accent's still friends with.

And he's like, Ethereum, Jen, Ethereum by it. He's like a founding member on the board and I was like, I'm listening to you. And now, you know, Ethereum, I got in at 30 and now it's almost a 200. Yeah. And it's going to be the next Bitcoin. It is. And it is something that I've heard rumbling. My mom was mentioning it and I was like, I don't know, because I told my mom, I bought Bitcoin when it was around like $100. Yeah. And I was telling everyone, and I didn't have that much, but I was like, how much can I really afford? Yeah. So, um, but I was telling everyone, including all of my family, I don't think you should get this.

And they're like, yeah, but we're not going to. And now I'm like, see, yeah, shit. I got it. I was so annoying because my ex always talked about it. So I was like a parrot and I'm like, Bitcoin, Bitcoin, Bitcoin. But it really is. And well, this, here's why I love Bitcoin, besides the technical, um, reasons behind a deflationary currency separating from fiat, what better representation and actualization of money not having inherent existence than a currency that has no physical existence. Because that's fucking insane. And I mean, we know and like, you know, I know you've delved into the conspiracy stuff, but it's not even that.

It's not a conspiracy. Like, we used to be backed by actual gold, like there was like, that's actually how it used to work because it was a valuable thing. And it wasn't because it was just looked pretty because it actually had physical usages that other oars and minerals didn't have, but that's long gone, obviously way past that. But I mean, the fact that this shit is just just accruing value based on our consciousness, essentially, giving it value. I mean, you learned a very interesting lesson, which is, look, I'm making money out of air and then look, my air money is gone. Yes. Sorry that you had to do that sucks, but it's good.

No, you know what? I'm glad about it. Of course. You know, it was so humbling and it made me a better person and whether I ever get it back or not. Right. Let me be strong. And it taught you something that money can't teach you, which I'm sure Gerard from Rythmia would mention is that you learn how to surrender and let go of shit that you are getting attached to. And I think that's a very important lesson for a lot of people and also really hard. And I say that from the platform of not having everything so it's like, yeah, great. Okay. So you have involvement in saying that Bitcoin shit is nuts too, because I mean, I'm assuming not everyone who's listening to this knows what Bitcoin is, but you know, investigate it, look it up.

Maybe I'll put the YouTube videos I deleted back on. They're so fun. It's such a dork. It's such a dork. I'm like, it's a deflationary current, it's such a dork. To date, the only time I've had a camera train on my face where I'm talking about something and I was like really excited about it, but it is cool. Okay. So you were learning, you clawed your way back up. You had this project that you believed in with evolve and ascend. It's now firing on all cylinders, I'm sure the attention we've been talking about this, how things really seem to be lining up like we can sense that good things are happening within this weird kind of not just digital, but community of conscious entrepreneur.

I don't even know what the fuck to say. It's a weird word, but it's happening and then you go down to rhythmia the second time. Yes. Let's hear about this. So going there the second time, I was going in so humble and like so unbelievably grateful for what a wonderful gift, but I'm like, man, it was like a really hard few years. I'm like, I'm not really sure what's going to happen. Right. Which is the right approach when you're doing some big potentially things. So I was the same approach the first time I did ayahuasca and I like expected to get sick the first time and I did it, but I'm like, I'm definitely going to get sick this time.

So I get there first night was mellow and the second I was the first ceremony. And according to the shaman, there are four types of visions that you can have on ayahuasca. There's the nothing vision, which is still something because ayahuasca is working its way through your system. So you may not have visuals, but you'll get sick and purge out stuff and it actually like works its way through your genetic lineage and clearing out all bad karma. Then there is the celestial vision, so that's where you like meet like angels and entities and have that probably like what I experienced the first time.

Right. The one back then. Then there is the consultation. So that's like where you meet like your past lives and like see your purpose. And then there's a psychic surgery. So I may be missing one, don't quote me that it's exactly four, but this is what I'm remembering when you told me. Sure, sure, sure. So the psychic surgery is where you'll feel phantom pains and it's like energy being removed from you. Yeah. So that happens in regular life, right? Yeah. Okay. Yeah, like Reiki and stuff. Great. Energy is palpable and real. And just not to get too sidetracked, but like I've had an experience as growing up as a human where like you get these weird pains sometimes and you know sometimes it's like a virus or something like that, but sometimes there's these weird pains and you know, I'm like, what is this?

Like a real thing. And then you realize that this is some like karmic or psychic. There's a connection there. Totally. It gets to the root of it and it goes away. Okay. Totally. Yeah. So the first night was like my nuts. I had no vision, but I got really sick and it's a very uncomfortable sick because ayahuasca does not taste very pleasant. It's like your bermata was a barbecue sauce texture. So not the best, but the next day I felt so good where I was like, I released a lot and I'm like, even though I didn't have these incredible visuals, I'm like, I feel like my body's healing. So then, you know, that was with their onsite shaman.

Then Taita, Taita Juanito is the shaman that they had coming for their like main event that week. So Taita Juanito has been studying the medicine since he was four years old. Oh, wow. He actually had been drinking. How old is he? He was 37. Oh, wow. He studied, they call it like his grandfather as like the elder grandfather, Laurier, you know, I believe his name, he is 110 years old and he, I mean, I saw a picture of him. He looks like he's like 60. And that's who he'd like learn the tradition from. So everybody says like Taita, Taita is this magical man that made him amazing. So I went in, he wanted to have consultations with everybody before the healing.

I met him. I looked at him and I started crying and I was like, you are just like this pure being and I felt so much permission to like really say like, I just want to feel good all the time and I want to release any like trauma and whatever I'm holding on to that's not me. And he's like, okay, good. So a few weeks back, one of my colleagues had hired my boyfriend, Richie, to do a video for her about the shamanic stuff called Rape. Right, right. I saw that. Right. So when she made this amazing video, Rape is a shamanic snuff that's believed to like clear out like negative energy and open up your crown chakra and Taita offered me Rape.

I tried it for the first time a couple weeks prior and it was like, okay, it didn't like add too much of an experience with it. I was like, oh, nothing like the video. So Taita gives me Rape. Yeah. Oh my God. He's like, okay, now you can leave and I am having to walk out of this consultation room and it was like, I was just like, felt like Hunter S Thompson, like in fear and loathing in Las Vegas when he was like walking down the hallway and I got outside and my body just became so dense and heavy and simultaneously feeling like I was out of body and my crown chakra was blasted open and I got so sick and I'm sitting, trying not to puke and I'm repeating the litany against fear mantra from doing, I must not fear, I just face my fear.

Right. Right. It wouldn't go away. Right. And then I got really sick and threw up and out for four hours, I was just outside like, I can't walk. The Rape killed me. Repeating like gathering around you and watching. Not really. They're kind of like, all right, she's doing her thing, whatever she's, she's, she's, she's journeying somewhere. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So, girl, she, if her husband was like an assistant to Taita, she walked me to my room and I just talked it out and then mellow the rest of the day and I was like, all right, finally felt better. Right. Right. Afternoon. I don't like that actually was like a really good thing.

Yeah. I'm like, I'm glad that I got sick because that like, I feel great now. Right. Right. Right. So then that night I took a holotropic breathwork class because Rizmia offers like all different things. Yeah. So even if you don't want to do ayahuasca, there's massage, there's yoga, there's breathwork, there's amazing classes, Gerard teaches a class called Truthonomics, which is all about like mindful money-making. Sweet. There's just such a diverse experience. That's awesome. So even if you don't want to do ayahuasca, it's great. So I go into this breathwork class and the facilitator of the class had their beautiful girl, amazing energy and basically the class starts and we had to go back to back with somebody and like just breathe.

And the breathing pattern was like very kind of like frustrating to do because it almost feels like you're making yourself hyperventilate. And I felt myself saying like, "Oh my God, I'm going to have to do this for an hour. I'm going to do this for an hour." And then I let go. And I did it. And it was like a psychedelic experience. Isn't it nuts what the breath stuff can do? Unbelievable. Yeah. The body's amazing. I know, I had a, there was a Tom Canyon, who I mentioned before, it was the Megastory connection, he, we went to a, my friend and I, to a thing in New York, Upper West Side in New York.

And he does these like crystal bowls and these amazing chants from all over the world and ancient lineages. And he's got like a four and a half octave vocal range. So it's like from the low, slow, so like angelic, like you're constantly at first, like opening your eyes being like, "This is like a trick." But he does these bowls for like three hours in these sessions and then there's a break and there's more. And we're on the Upper West Side, Stone Cold, sober. There's a very lovely woman right ahead of us in this huge Peter J Sharp Theater. She's from New Orleans, nice grandmother, you never would think she would be in something like this.

Totally normal. The thing goes for three hours. There's all this different type of breath work that you're doing. And I swear to God, I have never been that high in my entire life. We walked out of the, that we were supposed to get like lunch or something. Here's what we, the concept of food was like, "What, I don't need that stuff." And we were just floating uptown. And I was like, "Man, I feel like I smoked like 13 blunts." Like I really just like, I don't understand this just from breath, pruning out. I mean, it was, it's insane. And then people don't realize, because who does that, like you don't just sit around breathing for an hour.

Yeah. It is amazing. It's really nuts. Yeah. Okay. So you were doing the holotropic breath work. Yeah. And I totally had a psychedelic experience. And it was very emotional. And I know where I started crying. Yeah. And I was just crying and letting go of all this stuff. Because you know, last year I had like, it was like a, a really tough year. Like I had heartbreak and just a lot of reevaluating like what I'm really supposed to do. I feel you so much on that account. Yeah. And I'm like, you know, I like go and I cried. And it was like catharsis was so good. So it was like all this like free release.

So like between like throwing up, getting sick, crying. It was like just like, I sometimes called tears, like orgasms for the eyes. Yeah. Like they release. Yeah. Yeah. So that was amazing. And then, you know, the next day was for ceremony with Taita. Yeah. So all of this in preparation. So before the ceremony was Taita, we had basically like plant medicine integration. And he talked about what to expect divisions, everything. And then they mentioned something about a woman like the if women are on their period, they can't participate. Right. I had just got my period. And I was like, oh my God, I came all this way and I'm not going to be able to participate in this.

I'm like, I'm not going to be able to release like the steeper healing I really want. So I told, I told one of the assistants that I had been on my floor and she's like, oh, we are going to have to ask you to sit out and I was like, what? It's like I came all this way. So it's like, okay, so I went to my room and I had a good gripe and I just let it rip. And I was like, just all the things that I like needed to forgive and was upset about and whatever. When I get a knock at the door and it's brandy and she's with Taita and his assistants and Taita felt that he was called to allow me to participate.

And for the first time ever, he allowed me and another girl that was on her cycle to be a part of it. But we had to wait until one o'clock in the morning, so he had to open the space, consult the medicine, make sure everything was okay. And then we were allowed to participate outside of the ceremony space. So she and I, which was like amazing because we got to sit outside and the stars. So you know, I get there at one o'clock, I'm served the medicine, not by Taita, but one of those female assistants. And it was... Got like a whole woman's situation there, that's pretty sweet. Totally. I didn't realize how much of that I needed to heal within me.

So it was exactly what I needed. So it was like trust and letting go. And the women that helped were so wonderful and just such beautiful energy. And the first ceremony, you know, started at one and then I took it and it came on so fast. And I closed my eyes and it was just like snakes, snakes, but like beautiful. And it was just super visual. But I got really sick, a lot of sickness, but it was so good. How long did it last? Until like six o'clock in the morning. What else happened in it? So it was a lot of just like fractal patterns, snake, cosmic serpent, like forgiveness for like people that, you know, it didn't go the way I hold and letting go.

And you know, I think I also come back to a lot is like anytime I like hold onto a disappointment or, you know, sadness over something that happened is to look at each individual person that you interact with as a child. And it's like everyone at one point was a child and that child's still inside all of us. So it's like, don't be angry, forgive and love that person like the child that they are. And it's such a great way to like transmute anytime you feel resentment or anger. It really is. It really is. It's like the, the, I don't know what to say, like the philosopher's stone. Well, I mean, Saul Williams calls like he says, the heart is the philosopher's stone.

Yeah. And really what it is, is like looking at things with your heart. Yes. So that was like amazing catharsis. And then so the second night, I'm like, all right, cool. What's going to happen now? I feel ready. Right. You know, what ceremony again, we come might drink the medicine at two o'clock in the morning. And the visuals start to come on super strong. And I was just like, time traveling. So like the first thing I see is I have like in this dimension where it closed eyes visuals as though my eyes were open and it was just all sorts of people that were like, the universe wants to play and nature of the universe is playful.

Human beings over complicate things by not holding on to the sense of play. Yes. I mean, I'm so glad to hear that. Yeah. And then they say to me, they're like humans, humans, humans, humans so complicated. It's like, does a bird read a self-help book on how to be a bird? No, it's just a bird. It flies. Humans need to be, be what you are and do what you are. Don't over-complicate them. You're like, you're right. Yeah. Oh, I thank you for this. It's fucking amazing. Amazing. So then I get out of that. And then I'm taken through my life and I see myself as a baby. I see myself like my whole life flash before my eyes.

And then I see my mother's life flash before my eyes. And then I see my mother's mother's life flash before her eyes. And it's all this interconnectedness, like the geometry of my soul. Was it just women? Women. And, you know, I love my mom so much, but my mom and I have had like a very challenging relationship because my mom is like a kid sometimes. And there's been moments in my life where I felt like I've had to be the adult and learn patience. And that day, which was like so awful, there's such a big heroin epidemic in New Jersey. So when mom is in Ocean County, like it's just out of control.

So many people that I went to school with have passed from it. So that day I'd found out somebody that I went to high school with had passed away from a heroin overdose. And she had a three month old child and so she was in my subconscious a lot. Oh, yeah. And I really loved her. She was such a doll. And it's like, oh, how awful. Yeah. So I think because of that being in my subconscious and being here, the medicine, like, I started to kick my ass basically and was like, forgive your mom. What would happen if your mom died? Like I got this whole cosmic reprimand and about like, yeah, like you think that you think that you're woke, you think that you're wise, like, treat your mom better.

And it's like, my mom and I are good, but it was like, no, you need to be better. It's like, you talent, like it was like, I got reprimanding. I was like, I'm listening to you. I'm sorry. Do you know the there's, I don't know which Tibetan Buddha said this, but it was, it's basically like, if you waited through shit for 10,000 years straight, it wouldn't come close to the karmic debt you owe your parents. It's like it's something like insane, like the worst thing you could ever imagine, like you don't even know. So like, and like I also I've had difficult relationships with my, with my mom and other people in my family at times.

And I think when you're on a good dose of psychedelics and you're getting in touch with like the deep levels of things, like don't fuck that up. It's short. And this is a fleeting thing. And like, whether we believe that this is the ultimate and final consciousness or there's something else like it's where we are now and best get used to people not being here at certain points. So yeah, I totally get that. I also think, you know, we're in a very shifting energy, feminine wise and I think that stuff is permeating a lot, uh, continue not to cut you off, but yeah, I think that's really cool. Um, but yeah, so that was happening and it got really intense and I started getting scared and like feeling like, oh my God, well, it's my mom dead now, like I had to call my mom.

Yeah. I was like tripping, obviously, but it lasted a really long time. So like even at seven o'clock in the morning, I was still like in it and I started seeing the snakes again, but it was like the snake felt like a teacher, you know, it wasn't anything scary. It wasn't like the, the, the devious serpent, but finally it, it started to taper off. I called my mom and this amazing conversation with her. And it was like everything I needed and didn't realize I needed and it was so humbling. I came back from that and I joked. I was like, man, I'm like, I bow to nature and all of her reverence and beauty.

And I listen, I am sorry. I will never like deviate from this path because it's like the truth is like love and forgiveness and kindness to everybody, not just when it's convenient. Sometimes when it feels not convenient, you have to do that. Um, so that's my big takeaway is that no matter what, to try and be more patient, to love, to forgive and to let go of all of it, you know, like all of it ex boyfriends, friendships that didn't work out. My mom, my family, like love everybody for who they are, who's they're all on their journey too. So my, you know, who I consider my guru, named Corley Baba has a quote that is infuriating and infuriating quote, which is love everyone and tell the truth, which seem at many different times completely diametrically opposed.

But if you really can get into that space and know that when we talk about these things, recognize that, whether it's the culture, whether I don't think it's human nature, but we oscillate. We don't stay in that state forever. But if we can remember that that is really what's going on and when we're encountering difficult and negative situations or people, um, to remember that it really is like it's not for their benefit. I mean, it is, but it's really for our benefit because that allows us to function in like a very clear way for a lack of a better word. I love that. Yeah. That's. So since then, which has not how many, how many two weeks, three weeks and just getting over sunburn.

Yeah. There you go. Um, you know, how do you think it's impacted your life from like a day to day practical standpoint, because I can still tell there's like the afterglove, the experience clearly. Yeah. That is being kind of the internal shift. If you could pin it down. There's been an acceleration of creativity and, you know, you had pinpoint it, saying like thoughts manifesting. Yeah. Yeah. It's on hyperdrive. Right. And I think it's also just the fact that I feel like in such a place of gratitude and humble. Yeah. And just gratitude, humble, which is a prerequisite for a good situation. Yeah.

Festing. Totally. You can manifest situations without being humble and grateful. But I think it's going to not be a good thing. Totally. That's awesome. And it's more like confidence and like the trust fall, you know, like allowing what, what has happened so far and to be here. And I just feel really grateful. That's so awesome. Yeah. And that's so awesome. I'm really looking forward to getting down there, but, um, more importantly, I mean, like, how does this, how does this kind of weave into what you, I know, as someone you are into your end conspiracy theories and things like that. And the darker side of, you know, a cult matters.

What is your perspective now on those types of things? Not that I'm sure in any way they're invalidated, but how do you approach those types of things? Just even if you haven't like done it to this point, like, what is your, how do you view them now? I'm curious. Um, so yeah. So for me, you know, I had my first psychedelic experience when I was 17. Cool. And a group of friends and I got mushrooms and I took them and I was like, this is truth. And the thing I kept going back to was how like everything felt like I was learning it for the first time. Right. And like that same awe and kind of like wonder, right.

And just understanding why like what intuition, the purpose it serves. And you know, I was like, this is how it should always be, you always need to maintain that child, like all on wonder, and I was 17, my first download. So every psychedelic experience I've had since then, the intense thing with mushrooms and like everything in between has served to just validate the interconnectedness of everything. So it's like you can meditate and get there. You can have a dream and get there. When nature shows it to you, this, this thing that comes from the earth that's living and I feel like it's sentient.

It helps just validate like the idea of cosmic consciousness and spirituality. So it hasn't opposed anything spiritual I felt or intuited. It's confirmed. Perfect. That's why I like to hear because I think a lot of times, and this is the trap of spiritual materialism is we can sometimes want to jump from thing to thing. And what I'm seeing now is kind of this confluence and, you know, coalescing of these things and not kind of an opposition where you have to pick whether you're going to be a Buddhist and take plant medicine or you're going to have to pick if you do these things. And I think that's really amazing.

We're seeing it also empirically and spiritually with the Dalai Lama and quantum physics and all of these things. So I think that's a really fucking awesome thing because now we do have that flexibility to kind of approach this in a way that makes sense for us, which is what it's about. And I love that it's confirmed and not opposed because I don't think, you know, sometimes I feel like a dingus because I'm like, well, yep, I see how that makes sense. I see how that makes sense, but I hope it doesn't come off as though I'm just naively agreeing with things. It's like, no, I see how those things are actually connected.

And I think when you study a lot of these mystics throughout the years, like they all say the same shit too. Totally. No one's saying it. These experiences are like alchemical and nature too. So you know, there's a reason why the masons revere the Bible as the sacred text because if you can see beyond the words, you can see the metaphor in these stories and these stories are timeless. Right. These are the timeless stories that make up a human experience. And if you can extract the wisdom and the light, that's how you can apply it to your everyday life. So tell me the weirdest, one of the weirdest things you believe or I love doing this is one of my favorite because people wouldn't begin, I will lose all credibility.

People start doing what I do, but like, what's something that I may not know about too? Like what's, what's something? Well, I believe that cosmic consciousness is like the highest state of consciousness that you can reach where you see the kind of like interwoven connectedness of everything. And I truly believe that that's what Jesus, Buddha, Gandhi, Martin Luther King, John Lennon, Abraham Moses, you name it, I think that that's what they dial into and they articulate it through whatever their cultural programming or medium allowed. So for me, I think that's the ultimate state, that's the superlative state of humanity is to reach cosmic consciousness.

Right. And I think that, that's just like what everything comes from and returns to. And I think that love, I really believe in love, love is this fabric of, of being. And I just, That was my big download. That's, so after the experience I was telling you about, I, having never talked about it, thought about it in any way, would not stop talking about unconditional love. I would, I am talking about to the point where anyone who even knew what I was talking about would be annoyed because it was just like nonstop because I experienced it. And I was like, this is, this is it. And I kept experiencing it over and over.

And then the gaps in between stopped at a certain point and I was just in it. It's a direct experience that I think the skeptic could point to a chemical or something and say, well, it's your brain's physiology. But as a felt thing, it transcends that intellectual part that wants to kind of rationalize it. I do believe it is what creates our physical universe. And I do believe it's why we have this kind of playground in which to work on some of the things and issues that we all seem to have. And I do like that it's a supporting system. But you know, I know people who forever argue back and forth in their head, whether this is just a convincing story that some of us like to tell ourselves.

But I think what separates it from being just like a fantasy or a story is the actual experience. And then recognizing that this is an experience that has been spoken about, written about, talked about, you know, forever, like forever, it's ancient, it's far before language. That's for sure. So I love that that's your kind of, you know, big takeaway from all of this stuff. I don't think that's weird. What is some weird shit though? I was in a segue into what's weird about it is like what I guess is unorthodox maybe in that point of view is, you know, last year I had heartbreak, right? And a lot of people say, you know, if somebody wronged you, like, whatever, like, let it go, whatever, for me, the idea of coming back to love and forgiveness and even when it's inconvenient, I believe in forgiving and loving everybody, even the ones that hurt you almost.

Because when you don't, all that really hurts is yourself. So that may be weird. So it's like, I've forgiven, I loved even like somebody that put me through hell and back because they helped me see my angel, you know? So I have to find gratitude and love for that. Yeah. Well, that's the alchemy. That's magic. That's the real people want to hear about, you know, flying saucers and, you know, I can manifest gold out of thin air and all this stuff. And I believe this shit is out there too. But really being able to change hate, hateful regret guilt filled situation into something that's functioning as a, you know, generator of gratitude.

You can't live a better life than that because then anything that gets thrown your way, you're going to have a tool to kind of transmute into something useful. And like, this isn't to say like when you're going through it, it's going to be fun. Yeah. It's not like, oh, I got the tools. So I'm okay. But it really does begin to be something that really like, you know, serves you as a thing. Totally. And I'm far from perfect. And I'm still working on that, but every time I deviate from it may take a couple days or a month, I would come back to that, you know, and that's my goal is that I just want to be like loving and forgiving to everybody and not to overcomplicate it by like putting a dogma over it, you know, because I think that all dogma comes from forgiveness, but I don't believe in like brimstone and hellfire.

I think there's different dimensions to reality. And that very well could be a dimension, but one of my other favorite quotes is from the epic of Gilgamesh and there is no permanence, you know, where the character's going through all these different realms trying to find his friend who died and find an answer to all of it. And it's like finally gets there and it's like there is no permanence. Yeah. Nothing stays. Nothing stays. That's echoed in every tradition because we can empirically verify that, you know what I mean? Totally. Oh man. Just don't know. Like 14 podcasts. No word, this is, we really, we really should do more.

I mean, you're going to get your liberation frequency up on my iPod now. It's going to be on air. So I can have to hold you to it. We did the little seminar with SAC, Jen, this is, this has been awesome. I knew I had more stuff that we can cover, but we can find another time to do it around. Totally. The first of many. This is so cool. I know we're going to be doing a lot of cool shit together. Also, I'll point out in this episode, I pointed out a lot of the other ones. You have been like serving me amazing guests after amazing guests after amazing guests. And we're all incredibly grateful for it because we're like, Oh, we're so happy she connected us.

So like you are really, you're, you're in, you're in the right place at the right time. I'm sure you feel that. And it's just, it's an honor to be able to do this with you. Thank you. Wow. We too. You're awesome. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. You're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're. Thank you. You're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're. You're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're. You're, you're, you're, you're, you're. (upbeat music) ♪ Oh, it gives me life ♪ ♪ Oh, it gives me life ♪ ♪ But your tension means so much ♪ ♪ Oh, my, my ♪ ♪ It's over again ♪ ♪ Oh, it gives me life ♪ ♪ And that's what takes me life ♪ ♪ Oh, it gives me life ♪ ♪ Oh, it gives me life ♪ ♪ Oh, it gives me life ♪ ♪ But your tension means so much ♪ ♪ Oh, my, my ♪ ♪ It's over again ♪ ♪ Oh, it gives me life ♪ ♪ Oh, it gives me life ♪ (upbeat music)

♪ Oh, it gives me life ♪ (upbeat music) ♪ Oh, it gives me life ♪

Thank you for listening to this episode. How awesome was Jen? Really, I know I say it a lot, but really one of my favorite episodes, one of my favorite people, Jen, if you're listening, you know how awesome you are. Also, you may have caught, I was so caught up in that conversation, you may have noticed, I didn't ask Jen the last three questions. I'll have her back on again, and we'll get the practical tip, but I did, it was like, "Hey, Jen, I forgot." She told me, "Her favorite color at the moment is emerald green, her favorite number is 33, and her favorite animal is a fox." So there you go, on that.

Thanks for listening, donate, rate, review, whatever. I will see you next week, hopefully in better spirits. I'm feeling like it'll be better spirits, but if it's not, such is life. I will see you next week.