Embracing Your Inner Oracle with Jennifer Sodini

Welcome to Synchronicity, featuring the return of Yes. They exist. I talk to other people. It's not just me and my garage talking about Bible verses by myself all of the time. Jennifer Sodeon makes her triumphant return. This is her second, maybe third time. I don't know who can keep track. We had a lovely day the other day. That's one way to say it. We went sailing and it was amazing and Jen is just a very cool person, always up to cool stuff. She runs Evolve and Descend, which you can check out the website, the Facebook page, and it just does a ton of other stuff. We talk about her new oracle deck called Amenti, and you'll see some pictures. I'll put some up on Instagram and this is a very, very, very cool deck based on these questions from the Egyptian deity, Mott, M-A, hyphen, A-T, not hyphen, apostrophe. That's the word I was looking for. Mott, M-A, apostrophe, A-T, and you'll hear more about that. I'm not going to give the whole episode away. I've been told not to do that, so I'm not going to do it. Yeah, and that's it. Big thanks. We haven't had one of these in a little bit, but guys, Ned, CBD, magical CBD from people who give a shit about CBD. What a rare and unique thing. Go to HelloNed.com, use the code S-Y-N-C at checkout. Get 15% off your order. Get the full spectrum hemp oil. I get the 750 milliliter one. It lasts me about a month, and it's great. And then I say, give me more. And they give me more. I really, really think this is one of those things that if you're on the path to making yourself a healthier person, you might want to investigate something like CBD. Cannabis is the high priestess. She is your subconscious. She is someone who is going to build a bridge between your world and your imagination and the real world. Why not get introduced her with little CBD? I love THC, too. I don't want to get it twisted, but a nice introduction. A nice way to calm yourself, CBD. So go to HelloNed.com/Sync. I don't think you have to go to /Sync. Just use the code S-Y-N-C at checkout. Get 15% off. Imagine that. Pretty easy. Also, another update. This tarot shit is going swimmingly. I'm really happy that I decided to do this. I just got an amazing astrology reading from Kelly McLean's mom, runs a podcast out of comedy. She'll get back on it. I'm sure her mom, Kerry, gave me one of the best astrology readings I've ever had. It's kind of blowing my mind. I'm still digesting it. And one of the questions I asked her was like, listen, I started charging for tarot. Is that okay? What a weird question, right? And she's like, it's Neptuneian. You're supposed to be making your money from Neptuneian things like mysticism, teaching, and also essentially music. And so that's good because that's how I plan on making money. And that's okay, apparently.

So if you're interested in the tarot, like I said, I mean, here's the deal. It's not one of these things where you... I'm not going to tell you anything that you don't already know. Maybe there may be some hidden layers that we explore, but the cards are really just you. You're getting pushed through the cards. You're subconscious. You're unconscious. That unconditioned awareness is going to come through the cards. And then I'm going to do my best to get the fuck out of the way. And I'll dish out some hidden meetings of what the cards are and what the colors mean and what the picture means. But for the most part, it's just getting in touch with yourself. So if you've never done it before, a lot of the people I've been doing readings for on Zoom and Instagram and email haven't had any experience with tarot. So I'm going to get some testimonials from them. So people who are maybe like, what the fuck is this two talking about with tarot? What is this? You know, you can have a better idea of what it's and what it is. That's fucking great. And I'd love to bone up on astrology. But I mean, after this reading with Kerry today, I was just like, oh my god, there's so much so many conjunctions and planets I had never heard of like black Lilith. Anyway, one thing I'm supposed to say is this is the time of Athena, right? Warrior, princess, goddess, just buckle up. This is where we are, especially during Virgo season, but just it's a good theme.

Athena, daughter of Zeus came out of his forehead. She's a fucking beast. So tune into her. She is the goddess of owls, of snakes, of the olive tree. She's just really, really, really badass. And I encourage you to investigate what she's about because it's just a theme that's kind of emerging right now. And she's a goddess of wisdom. And she's great. And she's cool. So check that out. And I think that dovetails nicely into this episode where we talk about a lot of that stuff and kind of what's going on right now and how to balance the masculine and the feminine. And I'll give one last aside before we get to the episode. Something that really radical, the thing that really radically changed my life in the past four months was me getting in touch with the divine masculine. And I've operated from my life from the feminine. It doesn't mean that I'm a girl. It just means I've operated from the divine feminine for most of my life.

And when I started using the directional, authoritative masculine principles, my whole life turned around. So explore within yourself where you're coming from. Try to see if you can balance those energies internally and then see the kind of creativity that unfolds in your life in every facet of it. So I'll do an episode about that coming up a solo cast. But it's just an important thing to keep in mind where are you coming from? And how do you balance these energies? And how do you express it in the world? That may sound vague. It may sound new, but we'll be talking about practically how we do that soon. So anyway, that's it for the intro. Welcome, welcome, welcome. Without further ado, here is Jennifer Soudini.

Check, check, check, check, check, check. We are even sevens. All right, cool. Yeah, so this was, this is called a specific thing. It's like Arunda, I'm going to look for it. There it is. Yeah, Ardana Rishvara, the lord who is half female. So it's Shiva. Who is half male and half female. And you can see the Kundalini snake. And this is like the embodiment of like this world. And so you can see it's right there too, because I had just put it up before that happened. So that there was just a very weird thing. I don't, I was telling to Alexis, I was like, I don't think I want to put this on a podcast yet, just because when you start talking about like duplicate books, pulling shit out of a bookcase that's like wasn't there before, I don't know. Jen, thanks for coming.

Always. It's so good. You know, it's like there's a funny synchronicity about the fact that, you know, beyond the the books, the fact that Alexis chose the same book twice, the fact that you were talking about Kundalini awakening and this balancing of the masculine and feminine hemispheres of mind, but also Shiva is the vehicle. And you know, as we sit here and discuss our love of cannabis and things. So yeah, Shiva, the mountain that I was at last summer, Kailash, is where Shiva is supposed to live in small cannabis and hang with his consort and live his best life. You think you think I don't know about all the myths that have weaved their way through with cannabis? Yeah, it's every, it seems like every esoteric or, you know, spiritual path has some relationship to some type of plant medicine. And it is interesting that cannabis grows all over the world and seems to be weaved in not just even in an esoteric way, but quite literally into the foundation of this country, right, hemp paper and all that.

Yeah, speaking of which, we just went on a sailing for the first time. Who are we? What is going on? How did that even happen? Maybe let's backtrack. We were supposed to hang last weekend. I got a flat tire. Then I was supposed to see you yesterday, but the timing just didn't work out because I had to come up for my iOS because ceremony. And then this morning, it worked out that we just sailed around the Hudson. Like what? Yeah, like never have I, it was just a pretty crazy thing. I mean, I, it's weird. And like when all of these things start to happen, like if someone's listening to this and they've never heard the show, they're like, what's the matter with these people talking about sailing around the Hudson, like we never do this. This is such an atypical thing. But I think you and I can agree that there seems to be something taking place in our reality in this world that these types of situations seem to be increasing in frequency. And they also, as you know, I believe are directly correlated with our current individual states of consciousness.

So I want to talk to you about a lot of different things because I don't even know the last time we spoke about this. What I do know is you mentioned it, and there is a synchronicity here and a time collapse is it was, there were tarot cards upstairs when we recorded and I was like, yeah, I'm using these for song lyrics. Now I legitimately am using them for song lyrics, like I'm making songs with them. But more importantly, we have the tarot cards in front of us, but we also have a mentee oracle. And I know we briefly spoken about oracle decks and what it is, but I would love if you could give a breakdown again and explain what a mentee is and why it's here in the world and kind of, you know, your relationship with these divinatory practices.

Well, so the Cliffs Notes version of it is I grew up with my grandmother who was into the cult and esoteric philosophies. She taught me how to read oracle cards at a young age. Oracle cards differ from tarot cards and that the tarot cards explore the elements and archetypes of the soul blueprint coming into form. So it's the full journey of coming to understand the way of the world. It's always the same cards, the art varies in degree, but it's that same archetypal exploration. Same 78 cards. Yeah. Always the same 78 cards. So an oracle deck, you can create an oracle deck on anything. It's really your choose your own adventure game. Yeah. And it is what I call like the Rorschach ink block test of the subconscious mind. Right. So with oracle deck, you can subjectively interpret what the words, colors, art means for you and weave the story together through your own intuition. Right. See, this to me is what drew me to tarot in the first place, because I started seeing these static fixed cards with, you know, representational meaning and alchemical symbols.

It just became clear to me when you just, you know, you're like, wouldn't it be weird if out of all these cards right now, I pulled this card and then it happens and then it happens again. And then you keep pulling the same card and I'm like, what's going on here? I'm like, why is this happening? And I realized like, holy shit, this is like my unconscious. Like this is me talking to me. These are synchronicities being generated. And then, as I got more and more into tarot, I was seeing your a mentee stuff and I'm like, Oh my God, like a more oracle deck. Like it makes so much sense, because then you're convinced you're talking to yourself. But you're also doing something else really cool with these, because you put out this deck that people are using all over the world.

And it's like not, it's, I guess it's not like a game. Like I'd compare it to like something else that could go out into the world, like hungry, hungry hippos, like a board game, which is like people are having fun and that's amazing, the creator of that put that in the world. But when people are approaching this stuff, they're going into like deep inner exploration, trying to understand out the true nature of reality and themselves. And like, that's a very special place for people to be engaging something where you created out in the world. So explain to me the conception behind putting out this specific deck with a mentee and kind of the, where is it coming from?

Alchemically. Alchemically. Well, funny enough, it all came from a dream. So I had dreamed of doing an oracle card deck forever to honor my grandmother, to honor the path. The same reason why I wanted to create Evolve and Ascend was I had a need for something to be created into the world because it didn't yet exist. Yeah, the best reason for anything to come into the world. That's why we come into the world, right? Exactly. Right. So around the time this idea came about, it was like 2014. I was like, I really want to do this. There wasn't as many oracle decks out there that really spoke to my soul. Unlike now, I mean, the amazing artists that are coming out with decks, it's just like been this influx in these pocket galleries of inspiration. But back then, there wasn't.

So thinking of ideas of what was the deck that I wanted to create that felt like a really great universal exploration of intuition and thinking of something of value. So it was based off of a dream I had in the summer of 2013, where I woke up in a dream, thought I was having contact with some being from another planet and it basically was looking down this hallway. And this being pulled out of scale on a feather, a scale with a feather in a heart and said to me, there is no alien, there is no separate, there is no other, all that matters in this life is your heart is as led to the feather. And back then I had never read the Egyptian book of the day.

You didn't know anything about it. No, I didn't know anything about it. I was drawn to Egyptian iconography, but I had no idea what that meant. I just always liked the word that the symbols draw you in before you consciously. That's why it's so effective, you know, totally. Simple speak to the subconscious mind, right? So when I came home and I googled that, I was like, holy shit. And this is like such a special, special concept of like my heart has always been my compass to my own detriment, but also always leading me to what exactly what I needed. So basically looking further into the Egyptian book of the dead and what this feather, the feather of Maat, some pronounce it as mayat. It basically is this concept of order out of chaos, truth, justice, living in accordance with the heart. So when you are in the hall of judgment in the Egyptian book of the dead, they basically ask you these 42 questions, which are called the 42 negative confessions of Maat. And what are some of the questions? So I have not committed sin.

I have not slayed the cattle of my neighbor. Like, do you know what those like, I'll chemically mean, right? Do you know what sin means? I just found this out.

What is your interpretation? - Literally just the root of it means to miss your mark. It is not actually like just I'm talking about the root linguistic meaning of it. And so when we talk about sin, people think it's like some bad thing that you do that you should feel guilty of, but really my interpretation and conception of this, just from the language that you use biblically and predating it, apparently, is you just miss your mark. Correct your aim. You don't self-flagely yourself and condemn yourself to a life of misery and feel terrible about it. It's just correct your aim. And all correcting your aim is recognizing, this is you, this is your show. This is what you make it. That's to me what's sending is, but continue.

This is amazing. I didn't know these 42 questions. I want to investigate all of them now, obviously.

So each of them is like, I have not or I did not. They were the negative confessions of Maat. So there are something on the opposite side of the spectrum called the 42 ideals of Maat. So they are the positive answers to the negative confessions. So instead of I have not committed sin, it is I honor virtue. So each one has this positive connotation, the flip. And as a concept for a deck, when I first found the 42 ideals of Maat, I was like, oh my gosh, this is amazing. This is such a great way to live in alignment with the heart. And you know, me and my journey would have all been a sinned and my proclivities. I've always been about how do I find the unified field of these things? I'm so connected to the idea of theosophy, cosmic consciousness, one truth, many songs, everything connects. So looking at Maat and this idea of keeping a feather heart and weaving it into a deck, the deck became an exploration of unity consciousness and how to tap into that present presence. So it's not so much about divining the future. It's about tapping into the sacred power of your heart, the sacred power that has rippled through every major mystery and wisdom tradition throughout all the ages. Holy shit.

Well, I'm going to start using these cards. Number one, that's what I'm thinking of. As you're saying, and I'm looking at them, I'm touching them, I'm holding them like, okay, I think I know I get it. That's pretty powerful stuff, Jen. So it must be feel pretty good and fulfilling as you see it kind of getting out in the world and people, whether they consciously are aware of it or not interacting with it energetically like that. That's pretty amazing. So the Egyptian stuff, so here's what I know about Egyptian stuff. And I was drawn to it in about 2007, 2008, I got a cat from around this area. It was my aunt's farm, but I was in Boston. It's a little cat. And I named her Isis because I just there was something about like, I was getting into non duality at Veda Vedanta, the Vedic approach to this stuff of unity consciousness for people are smoking toad now to experience directly. Yeah, right, right, right. And yeah, I just the unity consciousness thing seems to be a theme right now, but also the recognition that while we experience and recognize that we're a unity consciousness, we also have this individual, individuated sense of ourself, right? So you say you don't use it to divine the future. My conception of time now is just blown to shit. I used to like say like, you know, like time doesn't exist and we experience it linearly. And then I would say like, Oh, well, you know, I'm not going to argue that we don't experience it linearly, but like my experience of it at these days is yeah, I can tell we're moving forward, but I don't. It doesn't seem particularly linear anymore. When days like this pop up out of the blue, and you're moving a huge metal mast off a boat and then steering a boat on the Hudson River, like feels like a weird dream, right? So what do you think? Why did you embed unity consciousness into this alchemically and intentionally? What what spoke to you about that particular theme, if we can call it that part of so that summer of 2013 when I had the dream when I did ayahuasca, the first time I started evolving a cent right after 2012. This is when we all died.

Yeah, when we all died, the timeline went down the other path. Yeah, really consciousness. I had that cosmic consciousness experience. And it gave me this lens that I couldn't look at the world in any other way. And with other decks. So even when I was doing Oracle card readings professionally, I'd always tell people that what it is, is me taking a like synchronicity, I'd say is like slicing into the breadth of time when we do a reading. It's seeing what iteration your thoughts are putting out into the universe. Yes. So we can see it. So then you can then create the outcome that you really want. Yes. Thank you. Okay. There's a fine line between manifesting and creating. And I believe that we're actively creating. Thank you. Okay. You're defining something here that's way better than what I was even asking. I don't even know what I was asking. This is so much better. So one of the things I was talking with Duncan about is that I don't use the M word. I'm going to be pejorative, not because I actually think there's anything wrong with the word manifesting. I just think it is a loaded term at this point. God is kind of coming back in vogue. God is kind of cool now. It's like edgy to talk about God. So we're cool with God now, but now like manifest in Asian. Oh, the law of attraction and the secret. This is like a big thing I hear. And I'm, you know, I have like, no, it's not that like those things to me and they're real because people think they're real. So those things work. So I'm not saying it's not real. It's lesser than it anyway. But to me, it's just an after effect. It's internal first, right? So, but this idea of the unity consciousness, I lost it. You're going to have to remind me it's too powerful. I didn't I lost what you were just saying. The difference between manifestation and creation. Okay. Got it. Yeah. It's very important because I think this is what I'm talking about with the law of attraction and imagination, the distinction between the two. Manifestation almost feels like to me that you are going to create someone forth something from external reality, whereas creation takes place up here, closed eyes somewhere without a body that you're experiencing and that it unfolds in this world as the after thing that happens. And I think that misapprehension really fucks a lot of people up, not only is like presented as kind of like the metaphysical subtlety to that, but just like an intellectual one like, Oh, yeah, like I'm gonna manifest a car right now. Like who's my eyes and it'll be there. And it's like, kind of, but only because like, I was saying today when we were getting on the boat, I was like, you know, some people, I was saying Neville Goddard thinks that like we don't actually move, like we're never actually moving. We're just, we're projecting ourselves forward in consciousness. So we construct the scene where it feels like we're walking it feels like we're on a boat. We feel these people they're all around us, but really we're just kind of like sitting still somewhere meditating. And we're like, this is fun. You know what I mean? And that to me is a huge distinction because creation to me seems to be the main reason that one would incarnate here. Why else are we here exactly? Training ground, kind of, but like creation creation. Yeah. Yeah. And that's the thing when you tap into that unity consciousness and that you realize, like you had said, that I and I, that I am consciousness, I am a fractal element of the Godhead and the Godhead really put me here because it wants to create and to see itself be created and to continue inspiring creation. It's you. It's you. That's the Godhead.

Do you know the Jehovah thing, the Yod Hey, bow Hey, how I talked about this with you? You can reiterate it. All right. So Jehovah. So also I'll preface this by saying I have a lot of friends from the Bronx who are just like they're from what we call the hood and they would speak. They would just make up names for everyone. And what they would call me is Jehovah. And I have no idea why I there was no prompting for this, but it just stuck and they would say for years. So I later found out Jehovah is actually alchemically when broken down a map for how reality exists. That's what the Bible is. That's what the New Testament is. That's what all these things are. So the way it works is this, if you break it down, it's made up of four Hebrew syllables. Yod Hey, Val Hey, or Jod Hey, Val Hey, and it turns into Jehovah. So Yod is the I am. It's unconditioned awareness. So it's just this awareness that exists. Hey, in our world would be the awareness of something, a desire, perhaps it is a desire. So that's the Hey, Val is the thing that binds the awareness to the desire. And that is the feeling of the wish fulfilled or whatever the thing is the desire is. And then Hey, is letting it unfold in the world. You just objectively look at it. So so what was subjectively conceived from unconditioned awareness is pinned to this reality in a crucifix, which is right behind your head there, Salvador Dali. And that is how this world works. And so when we read the Bible or someone looks at and they just see this God being like throwing things at people like floods and famine, they're like, what is this dick doing? That's what I used to think. This goes a dick. Why is he doing that? And then when you understand, it's like, no, this isn't a God. This is you. You're unconditioned awareness. You're also you. That's the beauty of it. I think that's what freaks people out is they think they're moving towards like this perfect state of holiness. And though just like dematerialize into God and they can't be them anymore. The best part of this whole shit is is like when you realize this and when you stabilize it and when you start experiencing it, you're still you. You don't you don't watch the Miami Dolphins. They're gonna be terrible this year. They're taking on purpose, but I'm gonna love every fucking minute of it. Like, it's beautiful. It's an amazing thing. And I just think it's cool that you put this into the world.

Truly, I keep using the word out chemically because that's what this is. You put physical symbols in people's hands, the tools in their hands. So what are some of the things you've experienced, you know, since the deck has come out? I know. Even even the creation period of the deck was so much synchronicity. Noah, it was so crazy. Finding Natalie, my partner in that Natalie Miller. Yeah. When her art when I saw her art, it activated something in me on a really deep level. It just reminded me of like eon flux, but with this like soul awareness. And I reached out to her. She was living in Chicago at the time. We became like fast friends. Turned out one of her best friends is actually my fucking downstairs neighbor. There are only six apartments in my building.

And originally I was going to self publish it. But as we're working on it, I'll preface it also by saying like as an artist in the creative, I hate nothing more than being told how something's supposed to look or what something's supposed to be. So I trusted Natalie enough that our process was I wrote the definition and I asked her to draw how it made her feel. And we started playing in the second round and it worked amazing. Dudes have problems with this. And in my experience, not always, but that's usually how I provide direction to things. And I haven't found to date someone who can just run like I'm like, just feel it and just do it. Just like you get it. I trust you like I know you're you know exactly what I want. But that was Natalie. She and I, she is such a powerful woman and just we have very similar life stories about like overcoming adversity and then losing our creativity and then tapping back into our creativity and finding each other.

But when we were starting it and we were going to self publish fucking know beyond all of it, like I got gifted a trip to Egypt. Natalie and I went down to rhythm together. Like all of this magic started happening. Well, everything conspired. Yes. And I would dream an idea in my head and that's what she would draw. So we'd constantly be like having these text high fives and being like, what is even happening? So when we got the publishing deal and it actually came out, it really felt like we say all the time, we felt like we were custodians of this work. And this was something that wanted to be expressed and chose us to express it.

It's fucking crazy, Jen. It's really when everything conspires to make something happen, it's just undeniable. And it becomes effortless. That's really where I think we should be aspiring to be with the most things in our lives, because it can be that it feels wrong to say that because our direct experience, especially if that has not been it, indicates that that's not how this world works. And maybe we redefined what effortless is like, I'll use what happened today. Like, who's moving this huge fucking metal thing that I think most people, if they went to go sailing, would be like, Hey, I don't want to do this. Be this kind of sucks. I cannot explain to you how much fun I was having moving this big metal thing. Like, it was fun for me. So it's not that like, it's effortless in the sense that, you know, maybe you don't have to do something that's physically taxing or emotionally taxing or anything. But it's that your approach to it is one of great joy and like excitement rather than being like, I don't want to do that. And it's like, that, that is what I think we should be moving towards with everything. And it sounds like this was burned into the world. It's, it's what you're describing is what I would say is like the Michelangelo of ideas and creativity. Michelangelo, when he was working with something said, he just removed the parts of the sculpture that were there. You don't create the thing. It's there. You pull away the parts. And that's essentially what you do. You removed all the physical and psychic barriers to this not existing in this world, pulled them out, found the person to do it, and then it happened and then lo and behold, we're having a conversation. Exactly. And it was really an exercise. And so my friend Justin Fierman is the founder of the Flow Consciousness Institute. And he talks a lot about flow states and how you're moving on the path of effortless ease. And this project was all flow. And the fact even today, I was just thinking a lot about the meta narrative about the fact that we're sailing next to the imagination on a beautiful day beyond imagination. And it just manifested the way it did. You know, like, what is that kind of meta narrative? Like, just flow, baby, you know, like, listen, we've been saying it since yesterday, merrily, merrily, merrily, like, you keep talking this, it reminded me of what I wanted to ask you to is you keep talking about these dreams you have. A, I want to hear, no, let's just write this a one part question.

There's no A, there's no B. What are your dreams like? Like, what is that process like for you? So for me, the best way that I can describe it is it feels like waking up into another reality. You're okay. I don't want to cut you off, but I'm going to Neville Goddard would refer this in a book that I'm going to give you that I printed in by myself now, like a Gutenberg over here. As you are waking up in a higher dimensional world, it is just a higher dimensional world. And if you are there, and you feel that you are there, and you do things there, it will inevitably be expressed in this reality. And the time variable of when it happens is totally dependent on your belief of that reality. Okay, continue.

So it's always like that. So it's like inception. So beyond the dream that I had that helped amend a mentee birth into the world, in 2012, the stream was even before a mentee. I had this dream where I was on a beach meditating with these monks, and these monks began to levitate. And as they were levitating, there's a palace behind us. And as they were levitating, there's actually like a beach, and the tide started to come in, and the monks realized the tide was coming in. So they came back down to the ground, ran to the palace, and I was like, I need to follow them. And I hear a conch shell going, and I'm trying to run to catch up with them, the tides rising, the door shuts behind me. Flash forward to last summer. The dream, the palace I had in my dream, was Patala Palace. And I had never heard of it before. And that's where I wound up into bed.

And we almost actually didn't get in, because the driver got our time wrong. And as we didn't get in, I was hearing the conch shells going, and it was just this insane thing. So it's always this replication of the imprints of my consciousness and how the collage kaleidoscope processes it. All right, now we're going to go over the technique. Have you heard me talk about the techniques at all? I haven't. I've been waiting for a hidden person. So this is how, okay, here's what's, we'll use dream language for this. I speak a lot about this with Stephen Cameron, who is someone who else has also walked into the dream many times like us. This is a dream.

This is not a conceptual reality. This is actually a dream. I say my mantra is this is the dream, my imagination is reality. What you're doing, which a lot of people do not remember doing, including myself at night, my dreams are kind of undisciplined, fractured, either reprints of a day sometimes, but also forward directionally experiences like you did, like you moved your prism of your mind forward and saw something. There is a way to do what you did, and we're trying to find the right word for it. Let's say select the reality that you want to experience. I've been using the word control. It's been bothering some people. Someone suggested I should use the word exercise agency over your life. Here's the truth, it's control.

It's control. I know that may say it's power and it's control, and you have to be okay with those words and you have to understand you use it lovingly, but it is control over your life, and that's what this world is. It's your life. That goes for everyone. So the technique is pretty much exactly what you're doing, but I'll give it to you specifically. So the first thing you do is identify something you want in your life. For someone like you, I would pick a pretty big thing, with the precaution, the precaution that even if you feel like this life is still like pretty, like it's crazy. Oh my God, like crazy stuff. If you don't fully understand and use this principle consciously, it will turn your whole world upside down. It is getting popped out of the matrix, and you can pop out of the matrix over and over and over. You know that. It's like that, what are those things called those fractals where it's just like over and over, but this one kicks it into another drive because this world becomes malleable. It becomes not just like whoa, this temple that I never knew about, it's like, oops, I did it again. You know what I mean?

You're Britney Spearsing every situation in your life that is meaningful to you because you know it's important for you and you're a fulfillment. Okay, so here's the technique. You find the desire, you find the thing you really want. You're clear about it. I write it down. My understanding is you do not need to write it down. I find it, for me, I would consider myself a beginner to an intermediate level. I'm sharing it, so maybe a little over beginner, but I'm still very much a beginner in practicing it here now. I write it down. Why not? What does it cost me? You heard in the Willpower's song, he's telling write it down, write down every good quality by yourself. Write it down pen and pen and paper. Yes. Yes. It gets real. She gets real. Exactly. Yes, that's exactly what it is. Okay, so you do that. And then what you're going for is a drowsy-like state, a meditative state. One would say I wouldn't call it a holier meditative state, but it's relaxed attention. It's the hypnagogic state. It's the liminal boundary between, I just remembered something, I'll tell you after this, it's the state between going to sleep and being asleep. So as you're in this state, you're not actually going to go to sleep, you are going to create a scene much like your dreams, your higher dimensional reality. You're going to create a scene that implies the thing you wanted, the situation, whatever it is, has already happened. The wish has been fulfilled. So it's going to be a scene that is after. So let's say you would just use a ridiculous thing that you and I would never want. Let's say you wanted to be president. You're going to pick something that we know for a fact, right? Yeah. Okay, so let's say you would imagine, gosh, don't use this out there for president.

You don't want that drop, trust me. But let's say you did. You would imagine, Andrew Yang use this, you would imagine a loved one or someone you care about. A very short and compact scene is vivid and as real as this world. Someone like hugging you or saying, congratulations, I can't believe you're president now. And the key is you would feel it too. So it has the sensory vividness, just like your dreams and the feeling. The feeling is the key. That's the vow and the yad hai vow hai. It's the feeling of it. And when you lock it in, you'll know it. You can go to sleep or if it's just like a meditation or you smoke some weed, it's also a little trick.

You just let it go and you carry it around like a fragrance. You don't obsess about it. You've planted the seed. You then let it unfold. That's the last hay in the yad hai vow. So you just let it unfold. You carry it around. You assume that it's happened. You don't you can listen. Everyone can double back and deal with their own internal threshold guardians because it's important to work those out. But that's what you do. And then it happens. And you don't take any extra steps to make the thing happen, you imagine? Because then you may go back and your logical and analytical mind will be like, Oh, well, that happened because of this, like that because of this. I mean, even if you're well versed in synchronicities and like weird metaphysical things, it still can seem like a totally, you know, Oh, well, maybe that happened because of this. So what happens is you keep doing this. And it's this is what we were talking about before. This is the divine masculine.

This is the directional energy that impregnates the subconscious, the unconscious. This is the desire. It is served up by the father, the archetypal father. And it is directed towards the womb. You assume it. This is psychological for every single person. It is there and it is birthed into the world inevitably, every single fucking time, every single time. To the degree that you understand this and wake up to who you really are while you're applying this, nothing is off limits in the world. Nothing. If you imagine yourself to be something that you are not close to being right now, it can still happen. It's just you have to understand your ability to believe yourself into that situation may take many iterations and versions of yourself. And the other aspect of this is you're you're essentially just appropriating states of consciousness after a while, you start with material things, start even relationships, other things, external things, quote unquote. But then at a certain point, you just start appropriating higher states of consciousness. And when you do that, that's when shit gets a little weird. That's when stuff is like, okay, what are we doing here? What's really going on? Like, what's really going on now? That's what I want to know. But it's awesome. And I can tell you, if you use this stuff lovingly, if you carry the golden rule around as an ethical framework, it's fucking it's that you can't fuck up. The way that you describe it, it really reminds me of you've seen what dreams may come right with Robin Williams. Oh my god. Can I tell you?

We talked about a lot of favorite movies today. That movie holds such a special place in my heart because for people who don't know, and I'll let you describe it too, but it's like he's going after his wife who committed suicide. And he goes through the worst. It's just such a, you know what it is? You know why we like it? Because that's what we're doing. That's what we done did. But if you wake up there, remember when you I don't want to ruin for people, but like when you find when you find out who you've been getting generous. Oh god. But the scene that sticks out so much is, you know, Robin Williams waking up to realize that he's dead and the transition to the space where he is in this imaginal realm. And seeing it's the painting that his wife had made.

And at first, you know, he realizes that beyond his feet is the paint, but then Cuba Gooding Union guides him to just keep reading junior guides him to just think, think bigger, think, think more firm. You can fly. You can build this. You've got this. And it's like, that is being in the death realm or whatever. Like I look at that as being in a higher state of consciousness where you can create the canvas of your imagination is wider and more infinite, not that it's not infinite here, but the palette that you're watching. This is this is what Blake referred to as a shadow of mortality. It's I said this to Alexis a few times. She got so mad. I was like, I was like, this is a dead world. She's like, what do you mean? It's dead. And I'm like, I was like, it's just, it's the effect. It's not the cause. It's the effect. So anything that happens here, like already was happening. We're just seeing it play out. And when you get that, yeah, well, that movie. We're not dead dead. We will die in this world. So in some ways, we are.

But I think, you know, this is a training ground on some levels. Like we have this dimensionality of time that moves luckily, not instantaneously. Like if you close your eyes, I'm don't do this anywhere right now, if you close your eyes and you imagine you're off in a faraway place, like at the beach or something, you're there, you're fucking there. So if you didn't have this body pinning you down here, you'd be there. So it's good. We're here because it's like, okay, okay, what's going on? Like, okay, if I think, if I think of something, then it'll happen. And it just takes like a little bit longer. Like that's what people keep forgetting. You know, like the amnesia of sleep, the amnesia of your life is you forget the things you imagined previously, the things you felt to be true. I'm poor. I don't have money. I'm rich. I have all the money in the world. Like money is flowing in everywhere. Literally are out pictured into your reality.

And again, there's so many like logical and just resistance to that. It's like, no, I make money because I provide a service and that helps people and they pay me for that. And it's like, yeah, that too. That too. But like, that is the after effect of what actually created whatever is coming to you or whatever is being reflected back. It's fucking nuts, Jen. It is. And it really to the it's people don't realize the power of belief and limiting beliefs, the container with which we view our reality and the words that we choose. And we choose to say, well, this is it. This is what I have to do. There's a really great YouTube video where this woman breaks down how even just the fact that we go to work to make a living to have a wake. So we wake to earn a living as we go to work. And it's like, wait, we wake, which is our funeral to live, to make a living through work. We're conditioned to believe that it's all work instead of play.

And that's why I love Alan Watts. And he talks a lot about the notion of play and Joseph Chilton Pierce also talks about that. And it's like, people lose touch with that imaginative sense because it there's a lot of like this childlike wander in it too. And that playfulness would be like, what am I going to create today? How am I going to play with this matrix I'm navigating? And if it's like a video game, I like the word that you use control because I always talk about the fact that, okay, if we were we actually are in a simulation, then somebody is programming the simulation. So who controls the controller? So this is infinite fractal. Who does? Who does, Jen? So I it's infinite. Who does, though? Who controls it? I think it's the infinite source of everything. What's that? That that? What is the infinite source? God. What's God? Yeah. Hey, Val. Hey, what is God, though? Let's break it down. It's your imagination. It's your imagination. It's also you, your eye and eye. Yeah. That's where this shit gets because I'm telling you, there is a human resistance to accepting the reality that you are God, not in like a yeah, I'm God, sounds good, but in like, oh, shit. And like, then you stabilize and you realize, oh, my God, is it okay for me to be God? Like, is that okay? Are you okay? All right. It's okay.

All right. Are we trying to help people about this? Like, what? Here's the thing. There's no repercussions except your whole world changes. You have to take responsibility for literally everything, including the people in your life who are difficult, the situations in your life that are difficult, the resistances, like, let's be clear. So we're just making sure we're dealing with the people who have, you know, put up the resistance of like, well, sure, it's great that you guys get to play and you tapped into this, but I am still working at a job. I still have these responsibilities. I have difficult relationships. I want to be clear. We're not implying that those things don't exist. However, however, however, however, play around with the idea that if you change your consciousness, if you change the way you think reality works for a week, don't do it for more than a week. And you start to see what happens. That's all.

That's why I love kind of what this, this deck represents to with the feather. It's an empirical measurement. It's saying, Hey, is your heart lighter than this? Here's a scale. I want to measure this. That's a, that's an archetype of empiricism. Empiricism is great. There's too many people who get off into this woo space and just want to say science is bullshit. It doesn't mean anything. These reductive materialists are assholes. And yet some of them are and some of them are projecting that. But your reaction to it is you being an asshole anyway. But it's actually like, if the only way anyone has ever proved anything to themselves and then out in the world, whether it's Einstein or whoever's listening to this is direct experience. And the only direct experience anyone ever accepts is truthful. No matter what you believe, even if you're handing it off to some guru or someone else is your direct experience. It's literally, it's you.

You have to test it empirically completely. Manly P. Hall, one of my favorite quotes of all time, he had once said that experiences with chemicals of life with which the philosopher experiments. Yes. Yes. And that experience, direct experience. This is where it like, so when Richie, my like best friend, creative partner, amazing human being, when he and I first became friends and I used to read do readings with my grandmother's tarot deck, he's a skeptical optimist, but he would see these readings and be able to tap into wisdom. And he would be like, holy shit, how does this work? So he being the skeptical optimist wanted to get empirical data.

So we did all these experiments where we took my grandmother's cards and then he took a hot pink index card debt and we wrote out the definitions of my grandmother's cards and we do readings with my grandma's cards and the hot pink index cards and fucking Noah, they would fall almost the exact same way every time. So he turned from skeptical optimists to became this big project, but we were like, wow, there's data. And he actually put together what the mathematical, oh, the odds against it and why our thoughts are powerful. So it was cool to see a convert, find his data and be like, okay, there's something to it. This is this is exactly why I think a lot of people gravitate towards like young these days and people like that who tried to take as much of an empirical. I mean, what is omitted, unfortunately, from a lot of these things, like people give Einstein credit all the time for being a genius and coming up with theory of relativity and special relativity. What I always ask people whenever they bring up Einstein, I'm like, how did he do it?

And people are like, I don't know, he was like a smart guy or something. It's like, he told you how he did it. Like, it's a famous thing. He imagined he was on a beam of light and he looked around him and he said, what would happen if this was going on? And then he came up with the formulas. And I'm like, the dude just told you like straight up what he did. And if that's not proof that that ripple effect of what special relativity and relativity did for the physical world and physics, you know, it's just like, this is how everything works. And it's this co-imaginal thing too. I don't want to, again, disregard the suffering of the world. I think this is one of the most fundamental truths that really is kind of difficult to grok, but it's there like, you don't turn away from the suffering of the world that exists. You bear witness, mainly so you recognize it's you, you heal up and down. All of your product tube is totally clean.

And then when you're like, you know what, I know that this is how shit works. I think it's time to take action because I do see some things that could be done a little bit differently. I think we need to handle this X, Y and Z better, you know, homelessness, ecological things, you know, educational things. Like there's just three off the top of my head that like, they're we could do better pretty easily. So it is this process of bearing witness and not tuning out. And like part of the playing is helping. Like this goes back to what I was saying with this heavy ass metal pole. That doesn't look like play to anyone, like who's looking at it, you know, even you know, like this and Eli, they're like, this, this is like what is this is not like something I probably want to do. But it was funny shit because you're helping and it feels good.

And then you get the the success of like pushing off into the water and gliding and be like, yeah, well, the best part about that too is that Alexis and I were convinced that wasn't just taking the pole off of the boat was hoisting it. And you were ready to do that too. And we're sitting here like, how is that going to happen? But you know, it's all right. I was sure it was going to go up. So now that's what you didn't see it. But back here, there's a tree that fell down. And I'll show you how it fell down. It's the funniest thing and Alexis comes out and she goes, you know, I think I did this. And I'm like, what? And like it just this huge tree. And she's like, you know, ever since we moved in, I this tree's been dead. And I didn't know whose property was on our ours, our neighbors.

And like I wanted it to come down. It's huge. No one heard it come down. Every we were out there like an hour before. And you'll see it and you'll be like, Oh, we and it goes right near our well house right in between these other trees. It didn't really do any damage to anything nature or otherwise. I'm telling you, Jen, just watch what happens. Like this shit is just going to get so awesomely insane. And I don't want it to get lost in all this that for anyone who's listening, like you do this, just test this stuff out. These cards, like I'm going to use these in reading snout. Do you want to do a thing? I would love to. Let's do it. Do you do you have me shuffle and then you do it? I would love to see how you work with them. Okay, let's do it. I'd be happy to give your reading. But I know I'm down. Amazing energy. I'm down. I'm down. I'm down. I'm going to put this down. You got to figure out something. What do we do? Talk about the debt, the deck a little bit more. I'm shuffling it. So as Noah shuffles the cards in the guidebook for MNC oracle, I offer different suggestions for working with the cards. So in the format, you can do a lesson of the day, which is just pull one card for yourself. Or you can do a past, present, future reading, re-pull three cards, or you go deeper and deeper and deeper. So I have a hole as above so below spread. I have a between the no or unknown spread. I just want to pop up and say this is fucking awesome what I'm looking at. This is so good. Okay, continue. I do three card, by the way.

Yeah. Oh, revelation of wisdom. Amazing. Perfect. Yeah. So yeah, again, it's a choose your own adventure game. And that's what I love about Oracle, where you can do the typical Celtic cross bed, or the Kabbalah tree of life, but you can also play. And it's all about the questions that you really what guides it are the questions that you want insight into. So however many cards it takes to have those questions answered, that's you do what where why. So Noah's going to be doing the three card spread. So lesson learned, which one is you're going to get a lesson learned lesson. So the revelation of wisdom is the lesson to learn how it may be learned and then the wisdom revealed. Oh, this is perfect. All right. I'm going to shuffle these a little bit more and then keep going on what else is done. You can do with these this deck. Yeah, there's so much. So somebody had actually reached out to me on Instagram and they'd never had an Oracle card deck before. And we're really wondering how to use it to apply to their life. And well, if you don't want to use it even for Oracle card readings, you can take pull a card of the day and that be your meditation prompt for the day. So say you pull I embrace the all. So I'm going to meditate on the idea of what it means to embrace the all. And then I'm going to ripple forward that intention to how I view my week. So if I'm embracing the all how am I meeting what I'm met with without resistance and looking to find a lesson and find ways to add that to my own personal mythology or to become a better person, how can I embrace everything and anything that I'm experiencing? And using that as like the question that guides the answers you receive throughout the week, there are so many ways that you can use it. It's like a study study cards or like a cheat sheet for like hacking reality. It just depends on which way you want to use it.

Attack reality. Yeah. All right. So I'm going to pull three cards. I'm going to make a space for this. Usually I'm a little bit cleaner in here. Have you heard of this stuff? This cople? Yeah, same stuff. Temple, copal. Yeah. Yeah, I love it. It smells so good. Yeah, he sent me it. Send me it. It's so good. Every time I smell it, I think of being an ayahuasca ceremony. Oh, is that what it is? Talk about fragrance of of imagining things. Oh, well, that's why it's here. Yeah, it's good. It's powerful. There's a lot of ancestral magic and power behind that ceremonial tool. I like it a lot. I like smells. Smells are good. I've recently gotten to smells like the past year and a half. They're good. Like, see how the light comes in here? It's cool. It's beautiful. All right. So let's pull the lesson to be learned. I respect the property of others.

That's a good one. That's a good one. And what was the second card meant to signify? How it may be learned. How it may be learned. I am peaceful. That's good. And then what's the last one? Wisdom revealed. Wisdom revealed. I benefit with gratitude. So this deck is the best. Wow, this art really is very good. It's so cool. It's like perfect for where we are right now. It's like the perfect embodiment of the divine feminine. So what direction did you give her in terms of like for like I am peaceful? What did you tell her if there's a dove on top? Is that a dove? Yes. So I didn't tell her anything. So she did it based off of my words.

So we talk and I am peaceful. We talk about the poems as rest in natural, great peace, this exhausted mind beaten tirelessly by karma and neurotic thought. And it's about the infinite ocean of samsara and the pounding waves and how to be peaceful as you navigate some sara and know that the sands of time and the hourglass of your life as you and this three-dimensional reality move in time. But if you can move fluidly with time and find peace in that, you can find ease in the process. So it was basically that's the cliffs of the passage and that Natalie drew that. And the whole kind of aesthetic guide that we were working with was I said, I wanted to feel like esoteric new wave. That is a really good description of this. It's so good. I really like that. I benefit with gratitude one. She's one of my favorite cards. That's like my yeah. I mean, I said my favorite. You got 42. Yeah. There's 42. Yeah. And that's the so I love that it wound up being 42. This is only 42 cards. So the 42 is really significant to Egypt because it represents the upper and lower provinces of Egypt. It's the judges that oversee the weighing of the heart.

42. There's so many layers to it. But I also love that it was 42 because the whole concept is ancient wisdom for the modern world. And in the hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy. Yeah, exactly. 42 is the meaning of life. But also in ASCI code language, they say that 42 equates to the asterisk, which can be everything and nothing. Oh, shit. So 42. Is that has that always been one of your favorite numbers? Or you just found out about it after it started following me as I started working on this project. And my girlfriend, she came to visit me one night. And we had this like night of synchronicity and flow on beauty. And I said, this is a 42 evening with everything and nothing and weirdness and numbers. And then it breaks down to six and numerology. And my friend, who's a non dual capitalist numerologist talks about what six is in the tree of life.

So we go over all the different layers of things. Tree of life thing here. My sister did it. I ran out of crystals. I kind of like put up my own version of it. But yeah, all this stuff interlinks in a very interesting way. It's just, it's just kind of amazingly fun to see it. Like, do you know about CBN symbols? Do you know about those? So in astrology, right, there's the zodiac and it's a circle. And so there's a degree for every, you know, 360 degrees and it goes around. So these two, like there was a mystic and I think a scientist, I want to say on like the early 1900s who came up with words and there's no images. It's words, a keyword, and it's like a phrase, a keyword and the degree of the astrological symbol. So I'll show you one.

It's an oracle. Cool. I'm into oracles. So I'll show you what like you do. I always have it open nowadays. So and I tweet them out now. Oh, beautiful. So the savian symbols in astrology. So the poetic imagery of the savian symbols is useful in providing insight and guidance into current situation as an and is an effective way of tapping into both the universal or collective consciousness as well as the personal unconscious. So I agree. So you pose an inquiry. And so you, they're also, I have it right here. You can see this chart. I recommend everyone get a printer. I thought it was lame in old school. Get a printer. They're fucking awesome. And they're so cheap. They're like 50 bucks. The ink is expensive. Yeah, if I can get you on that ink. But um, so every day, as you can see, so for instance, today is August, no, we're in September now, one, Virgo nine. So every single day has its own symbol. But the oracle, you just ask a question.

Do we want to be general or do we want to be specific? Let's be specific. I know drilling down. Yeah. I would love to know if the date that I'm working at launching my podcast on an ideal date. Okay, let's see. There we go. Libra 28, a man in the midst of brightening influences keyword responsiveness. I like it. So yeah, these things, these things are pretty nuts. Like I have found that all of these things, whether it's Sabian symbols, this is the reason I bring it up. Tarot, oracle decks, astrology, Kabbalah, how do you say it? Kabbalah? Kabbalah? Kabbalah? I say Kabbalah. We're gonna say Kabbalah. Kabbalah. Kabbalah. Kabbalah. Kabbalah.

Ta-doh. Ta-doh. I say tarot. I say tarot. Yeah, I just say it like that. Um, they all ultimately are just tools for reflecting back your current state of consciousness. And when you recognize it, they all become incredibly helpful and interesting. And you just let them guide you for what you should be doing it at any given time. And I think that is like people want a blueprint for how to trust their intuition or identify their intuition. And these are gentle tools. You know, you can take ayahuasca and LSTA. Those things are great. Um, but if you want things that maybe you won't make the misapprehension that it's because of ayahuasca or because of LSTA or because of weed or something, you know, these are pretty great modalities to play around with. I'm so glad that you said that. So today on my way to your house, I had called Richie to tell him about ceremony last night and what had happened for me. So I have to say, I've done ayahuasca like 30 something times. And I said yesterday that that was going to be my last ceremony for a while. And I had my ass handed to me in a way that I just can't even tell me what happened. I mean, I know this is last night. It's just the medicine was really strong. I only took half of a cup. We were in a geodesic dome, which I swear to God is what made this energy so much even more reflected back. Yeah. So we're like in this Buckminster Fuller Bucky Ball, I've got centered space. And as the medicine came on and it started hit me, it was like I recently did five Mio DMT, which is the toad where you're basically in that void of everything and nothing and overwhelm and just it's short lived though.

Short lived. I had six hours of what felt like being in the toad space where like no, no difference between my eyes open and my eyes closed visuals. And a lot of it didn't make sense. A lot of it was just like crazy symbols and spirits and looking at things and people weren't people. How did you process it like as you? I was still just like, I still had something in me where like, you know, when I went to go look at the bucket, the bucket was just a fractal. I'm like, I feel that this is a physical object, but I can't see what it is. And I really need to throw up. Let me just puke some fractals into this fractal. I'm like, I'm fractaling out into the fractal. So it was just a lot. And it was intense. And I was just like, I can't believe I opted into this. And I kept forgetting that I opted into it. And that everybody else was going through the same thing. And the ceremony, the woman who runs the ceremony is really potent. She's a wonderful maestro of space. But it's not like other ceremonies where it'll be a shaman that comes up to you and guides you. You were like, really like, figure the shit out. So that's that's going through that. Yeah, going through that and being like, Oh, I, even if I was like, help, I don't know what the shaman could offer at that moment, no emotional support, no, nothing. So I really had to just breathe and surrender into the experience. So then as I surrendered and things started to transition out, then I got the cosmic ass whipping of just being like, you're lazy, you need to take better care of yourself, you need to be a human enough with going to the astral plane, just listing all those things that I need to be grateful for and embody and blah, blah, blah. So I'm telling Richie about this experience. He's like, well, it seems like what you got was like, I was just like, Hey, you want to see you all the time? Here you go. And then, you know, I got my kind of reprimanding. But the thing is, and I think what I've come to was journeying with the medicine so many times, when you first do ayahuasca, it's so mind blowing. Because you think that you're receiving this thing outside of yourself and you put so much into ayahuasca told me and I have such reverence for this medicine and the spirits in it and whatever else. But ultimately, I think I've gone to a place where it's like, wow, I know that that's me and I'm me and it's coming from me because everything is connected. So it's not outside of myself. It's a revelation deeper within myself by being able to see beyond the obscurity, the obscuration of ego, to know what is actually deep in the essence.

That's the true essence that's within the essence of every living being on this plane. I couldn't agree more as you know, I pulled a Sabian symbol while you were doing that and it's Scorpio for a youth holding a lighted candle and its reliance. What that means to me, what you're talking about is that youth holding the candle is everyone. You have to hold it yourself and your reliance can only be on yourself. This is not to say that if you have a calling to do ayahuasca, you shouldn't do it. You are picking the best tool and path for you and you let your desires be your guide. That's the truth. Everyone has a particular path with all of this stuff and some of it may seem unconventional. I've been thinking a lot about conventional and unconventional lately because over time, I don't even mean 50 years anymore, generations, stuff shifts so quickly.

The gender conversation, how quickly we've gone from conceiving of the concept of a social justice warrior to the backlash of the over extension of social justice warrior type thinking and canceling everything and all this stuff or virtue signaling, virtue, all this stuff and we see it birthed and die so quickly. What seems unconventional, like Alice or Crowley level shit, isn't that weird anymore? It's kind of common practice, especially in the occult world. It's just to me, you do need the barometer. You do need your beacon that keeps you just from not being a complete hedonist and like just going and doing whatever the fuck you want, wherever. But I do believe we are living in a time where if you recognize it's you and you know you use these, what do you want to call it? Powers, your internal innate ability to create and select your reality, lovingly, you can do whatever you want. We move through not just conceptual anymore, the realms of samsara or outside of it, if we choose from the wheel. We do it here now, like we and not even like I'm saying like you're in Hill because your situations are bad. That's not what I'm talking about. Like you see it all of a sudden you're in a fucking boat. I'm going to boat. I'm fuck what the fuck is going on? Why is this so weird? Like I didn't say it's just like it's a very interesting thing that's going on. And I just encourage everyone listening to find what works for them. But I do believe it starts what you're doing your dreams, which is find the thing that shows you it's you. Find a technique if it's the imagination stuff, it's great. If it's ayahuasca, it's great.

If it's dreams, great. If it's weed, great. It can be all of the above. They're not mutually exclusive. But find the thing that proves it to you. You prove it to you. And then from there, like I'm telling you, it's fucking crazy. And you can help. Like there are a lot of people who are born. There is someone right now. Maybe they're listening to it who is going to cure some crazy disease who is going to help the planet in some way that we can't specifically conceive subconsciously. I know it to be true. Like when you know it, you fucking know it. And like, that's nuts. You know what I mean? Like that's how a shit works. That's really how everything works. And no matter how improbable it seems, when you look out in the world and you see all the suffering and you see people, you know, just that's again more validation that our state of mind creates these conditions, you know. I kept thinking about that a lot last night. And I've been thinking about that a lot lately too, is that our society is sick right now. And there is this sickness. There is this illness.

There's this great, I mean, as batshit crazy as Mel Gibson was, apocalyptic was a great movie. Oh my god, that is a wonderful love that movie. Yeah, that's that's when he's talking to when he's talking to Jaguar Parra, whatever the son's name was, the elder saying that fear is a sickness. And I feel like we have this collective sickness of fear. And without telling me so well, I think the more we each individually work on ourselves and heal our fear, we heal the fear of others by proxy. And that's not to be passive. It's to be active in aligning with now that fear is gone. Love is a law on love is a love, love under will, right? And magic is the art and science of causing change and conformity with will. How do you cause change with your will with love as you let go of fear and create and inspire people to be creative and to take action and to find their individual saying, I know my role on this planet is to be a creative person that, you know, channels wisdom through the projects that I am impassioned by. Yeah, I know my path is I'm not a science mind, I'm not a mathematician, I'm not a doctor. But again, somebody listening may have those proclivities and be like, wow, anything I imagine I can do. So I'm going to do facilitate, I'm going to figure out that there's a mushroom that eats plastic. I'm going to figure out that there's a cure for this wild thing. I have the ability to do so because I will it so and I love this concept of the results so much that I will will it into reality. So here's where I love what you said. But I think about willpower in a different way these days. I think about the not by might not by power, but by spirit alone, right? There's a there's like a song they made a singing Hebrew score or something. It's like a whole song. But anyway, basically willpower loses to spirit power all of the time. And I think there is a distinction again, these are conceptual realities, we could be very well talking about the same thing. But what I think willpower slips into sometimes is assuming that again, this reality is somehow the thing that needs to be changed. Whereas before in the imaginal realms, like when you're talking about love is the law. I jog now every morning, like four miles, because what the fuck is going on? Three years ago, it's just so crazy. It's just like the weird thing. But I jog by this church that I actually jog dog like four churches in like a four mile radius, like two mile radius, not even half mile. But there's one that has a sign and they change the sign up. And it says, God is love. That's what they changed it to this past week, or maybe today. And I was like, Oh, shit, God is love. Like, that's a cool thing. What is God?

God is my imagination. Holy shit. If God is love and love is my imagination, and what does every mystic in every spiritual and contemplative science and just pretty much every smart person ever say is what you should be doing, which is love God. If you start loving your imagination, watch what it's like. That's the bootstrap of all bootstraps. You don't even need a technique. Just love what your mind is outputting. And you won't love a bad thing. You'll know immediately and be like, that sounds good. Don't you it's not that you withhold your love from it. I was talking about this with Duncan, like he had this great idea that you find the worst version of yourself. And you send that compassion. And this aligns very much with what I was experiencing recently. I used to do this imagination, or this meditate, this imagination, this meditation, where I'd sit and visualize a future version of myself that was like, had his shit together.

Just and I put this thread, this like a theory thread from my navel to his navel. And then I would just do this for like 10 minutes. And then I would like high five. And I told my sister this and I don't know why. And I don't do this. And I will never own one most likely. But for some reason in these meditations, these visualizations, the future me always had a leather jacket on. I don't know why. It just always gave me a laugh too. Like I would never like, I wore a leather jacket once in college and I looked like a cocaine dealer. And so I was like, I'm never gonna wear it, but it just always made me laugh. But now when I do this, when I think of it, instead of me being the person that's connecting with the future better version of myself, I recognize like, Oh shit, I gotta send love back to that person. Like, I'm here now. I get it. Let me send it back to them so that I can complete that circle that a roboros and like, get it going. Like, and I really feel like the name of the game now is recognizing it's all you like you're saying, and then stabilize. I think we all get these moments and flashes of recognizing whether it's on a psychedelic or whatever. We're like, Oh, but then if it was drug induced or like some like retreat or something, you're like, Oh, is the retreat or is the drug? But if you use techniques and decks and things like this and do it with no, like there's no extra boost, you prove it to yourself. And then it's just it is like, what use your desires as gifts from God, which is you to unveil and unfold what you came here to do.

It's fucking amazing. Totally. I forget who who said it, but the whole idea is all these things, right, whether it's ayahuasca or local cards or meditation or vipassana meditation, whatever it is, whatever you're doing that's expanding your consciousness, consciousness once stretches like a rubber band, it will never return to its original form. It will only expand and expand and expand. So if you look at it like a muscle, I mean, I, it's something that if you continue to stretch that muscle and feed it and nurture it and nourish it with information and things that are activating your potential only grows to limitless degrees, which it already is. It's there. It's just uncovering it. You know what I mean? We have this limitless ability within us. It's, it's just crazy. I'm excited for you to try that. Like also, I mean, when I'm not pointing out, there's like, I did like 10 or 12 of these solo casts where like I'm breaking down like all the things I was going through. And then I finally broke through and I was like, Oh, like fear, doubt, anxiety, worry. Like am I crazy? Like just shit that one has to go through to get to this stuff. So I, I knew I was joking. I was like, either I'm, I've morphed into the most narcissistic version of myself, or there's something here, because I would go back and listen, because I would listen. There are points, especially like a month ago when a lot of shit was going on. I'm like, okay, like I think I need to hear something I said again, because I am dealing with some like something going on. And when you get to that point, that's when the, the push comes to shove, because you then have to be like, listen, am I really God, if I'm really God, then I can listen to this and know that this isn't some like weird self-delusory, like I am really going up my own ass right now. And if I'm not, then I got to double back on a lot of shit. And I was just like, you know what, like I get it now, I trust myself, therefore I trust others implicitly. It doesn't mean I'm going to be a rube and just get like screwed. Like, but like, I know that might where my intentions are, I know what gets reflected back to me. I knew when I got involved in situations where I didn't know what my intentions were, it inevitably came back and hit me later on always, almost always because I'm telling you your state of consciousness always gets reflected back. So annoying sometimes, but it's true. And when it's not annoying, and when you just like on it, it's the best. Well, it teaches you to become sovereign. You know, this last two years have been an exercise in me coming to terms with a lot of the debris around my ego, the template that I just kept projecting out into the friendships I would attract, the scenarios I would attract, all the things and like, what's the common denominator here? It's me. Why am I projecting this and being met with this back? Where does it come from? How can I change my behavior and identify the debris?

I mean, I love that word because it just literally just felt like debris around seeing the true light in the situation. And it was fucking hard. But like, what we're talking about earlier, like going through that and then going, hmm, do you see, do you see what the common thread is here? And it's like, fuck, yeah, you're right. And when you see it all and you figure it out, it's really tempting to go back and be like, nah, like, nah, this other stuff is going on. Like, that happened because X, Y, and Z. And that's kind of, I think, one of the biggest threshold guardians that people will face. And you know this too, like, we're clever. What what I'm saying is true. And what your experience is true. And mine is that we imagine something or have a dream of it. And then it unfolds in this world. That is potentially scary for people because they feel like they don't have control over what's going to unfold and what they're doing and what's happening.

And it's just this weird dance, like, it doesn't matter. It's still happening that I use this we talk about the massacre and the feminine and one of the feminine principles of the subconscious, the feminine, the receptive is it's impersonal. So it doesn't have any regard for people. It's not a thing to it. And there is no concept of right and wrong. There's it's non-selective. If you tell it to do some fucked up shit, it's gonna do it. And that concept really rubs the conscious mind the wrong way. It does not compute. If you see someone punch up puppy, your conscious mind is gonna go, yo, what the fuck did you just punch that puppy for? Like, there's something so wrong with you. You're a piece of shit. I hate you. That's what the conscious mind does. The unconscious mind just goes, someone just happens. Someone put it in the computer and this is what came out. So like, I don't know what's trying to show you. Like, I don't know, like, you care about animals enough to start a charity or whatever it is. But it's this weird thing where it's beyond morality. It's beyond these concepts that we have of duality. And that is a tricky horse to ride, truthfully, because like, I have all these pictures of all these things, like of all the different representations of ideas. But like, this is this is one. This is this, um, Heruka and Vajrayogini. It's a Tibetan symbol and there it's Heruka is a raffle deity. And Vajrayogini is like the enlightened feminine wisdom, kind of like the Shakti equivalent in Vedic terms. And they're consorts. And most people would look at this and say like, okay, well, this is just kind of like Tibetan point or something, what it really is representing is this divine union. And what's interesting here that people probably miss is you look at this and you see this, you know, blue, dark blue, almost black, God with a million heads and all these things around it. And you would think that he's in control, but that's not what's, oh, you can actually see his balls there. I just noticed that. But it's not.

It's she's the person, if you read through like the interpretation of these Tibetan mandalas and pictorial things is she's the embodiment. She's the thing that actually brings all this stuff in the world. And she's the most important thing. And I think this is a really good reflection of what's going on in the world today, because there's a picture of both. There's the balance. But if you really get it, like anything in this world is going to be brought into the world by the divine feminine. But one as an individual has to impregnate the divine feminine with their desires, their conception of what they want in the world. And any passing off of that, just it ain't gonna get it done. It just doesn't work in this world. And you know, this is again, this is a wrathful deity.

Wrathful deities, you know, when Tibetan Buddhism, when you die, they say, you know, you have this opportunity to see the clear light. And before that, you're going to have all these opportunities to see these wrathful and bodyments of yourself and all these things. And what it feels like to me is seems like we might be seeing this clear light a little bit while we're alive. And that's unusual. And I, as far as I can tell, that cosmically has not been done in linear time. But it sure as hell seems like that. So rather than when you see a wrathful deity to be like, oh, no, you recognize it. What do they all say? What? How do you do you know what they say to how you fucking see the clear light when you see your wrathful deity? So that's me. I'm not scared of you. That's fucking me. So like, if you play this game of non-judgment of non-duality and recognize there's consequences, you don't punch a puppy. You don't do some fucked up. I'm using the most like flavor. But you don't judge. I've seen someone punch a puppy, truthfully. And they're one of my best friends. And yeah, so deal with that reality, right? The conscious mind doesn't like that shit. Who would never right now do that again. But I've seen it. Just like Kevin Hart would never tell a gay joke on Twitter again. People change. But like, if you can non-judgmentally recognize what's going on, there's a lot of power in it. It's just, it's more powerful than this conscious kind of penetrating. I think I want I think this is good. I may have it. Because it's just like, oh, you want it? All right. You got it. Yeah. Bad, good. I don't give a shit. You're getting it. But that's the balance of, you know, when something happened that we didn't think that we planned, we become reactive and emotional and and angry and all these things. So it's like, if we can reframe it and be more of the observer or the creator instead of just this reactor, it's really important how, you know, the whole famous chromatic axiom about of chaos comes order.

So you can see that there's always ordered, orderedness even within the chaos. Specifically that there is. And specifically that you have a degree of control over it. We'll take maceo as our cue. Is there anything else people need to know about what you're doing right now or a mentee? What can people do to find out more about the Sevalv links, of course. Amazing. So a mentee or a mentee oracle feather heart deck and guidebook is available everywhere books are sold. You can get it at Barnes and Nobles. You can get it like the airport book stop, towels, everywhere. It's everywhere. It's on Amazon. You know, I have a volvinousn.com, which is my magazine with all this stuff. But I'm really most excited about that. I am going to be launching a podcast soon. Oh, yeah. That's going to be coming out. I have it slated for October 10th.

Amazing. 10-10. It felt really good. It's going to be called radio and mentee. And I really look forward to it. And I'm excited that you're going to be helping me support it. Oh, yeah. It's going to get really awesome. These next few months and then years are just going to be next level. I'm ready for it. Yeah. Might be about a dream, right? Right. It really is. Thanks for coming out on deck. Thanks, Nilla. [music] [music] Thanks for listening to that episode. Go check out Jen in a mentee oracle. You can find it all over Instagram, all over Facebook, all over everywhere. Evolve and ascend is her website and Facebook page. There's a lot of good stuff up there. Every day I post a video from Manly P. Hall.

So that's fun. There's just, she's the best. Just tune into what she's doing. We're going to have a lot of stuff we're working on together. She's just lovely. Go check out the tarot stuff if you're into it. Go check out the website, syncpodcast.com. See what else is on there. Go check out an earlier episode about imaginal techniques. I'm organizing them and making it easier, easier to digest this stuff. Any questions you have, Nilla@syncpodcast.com, I get back. I don't know who you'd be asking, but I get back. I get back. I really do. I make it a priority. I know there are points in my life where I wish someone could have just been a year to listen to what I was saying or they could have told me something and so I try to provide that as much as possible. Yes, I'm busy. Yes, I got a lot of shit going on, but I also got time for you. So don't forget that. That's it. Until I see you.

See you again or till you hear me again, happy imagining.