Addiction Waves

(upbeat music) ♪ All the time ♪ ♪ All the worry for you ♪ ♪ You'll be just fine ♪

Welcome to synchronicity. If you, I doubt you'll hear it, but sometimes I pace when I, if you can believe it, I walk around when recording these things. You know, if you're that type of person who does it when you're on phone calls, you get it. Anyway, welcome to synchronicity. What I was gonna say is if you hear a washing machine periodically, it is because I am walking by a washing machine and I'm cleaning poop that, not my own poop, which sounds worse than it is until you realize it was my two-year-old yesterday, had perhaps the most epic blowout I've seen when it comes to a diaper and poop.

If you don't know what a blowout is, it's when the poop explosively shoots from the back of the diaper out through the top of that into the onesie in this case and this was right before we were about to leave. So that was a fun little adventure and I am washing said poop from that onesie and the diaper pad. Do you like, isn't, isn't family life? Is, aren't kids great? It's hard to really put into words how awesome these experiences are. So anyway, that's what I'm doing. So if you hear the washing machine, which you probably won't, I just told you a convoluted story about poop for no reason, you know, that's what it is.

Anyway, today I think I don't know how long this episode is gonna be. What I do know is this is one that is, I hate to say important. At the end of the day, it's me talking into a microphone. How important can that be? But downloads experiences recently have taught me or shown me that this is a theme. This is absolutely a theme that many people, if not everyone, is dealing with in one form or another. And that's addiction, right? And I think when we hear of addiction, we think usually of substances. Sometimes maybe sex, sometimes maybe gambling, right? But it has certainly kind of a negative connotation to it, right?

If we think of like addictive behavior, you're usually not praising someone or yourself for that, right? And so there is a pull of some aspect energetically that comes with addiction. And for art, for this episode, what I'll be talking about when I say addiction is not just relegated to substance, sex, gambling, sugar, eating, whatever it is. It could be anything. It is just a thought or repeated behavior that you engage with, whether you want to or not, right? And that's the important part. If you want to do something, it's hard for me to tell someone that if they want to be doing something. I don't care if it's smoking cigarettes, doing heroin, you know, masturbating all day, whatever it is.

If that's your thing and you truly enjoy it and it's making you happy, I don't know that I'll qualify that as addiction. If it's especially, if it's not harming yourself or other people, that is a cardinal rule of substance, what you for me is if this is not harming yourself or someone else, have at it. Be honest with yourself about that and that goes for all addictions. Be honest with her, it's actually harming you or not or other people in your life. Be honest, but other than that, like have at it. I am not gonna be someone who says, you know, the only true path to spirituality is, you know, work in one way.

Do it this way. This is the only way. You can't eat meat. You can't do that. You can't do this. You can't engage in those behaviors. Have at it. But when it gets to the point where you're like, I don't think I like this anymore or I don't see the value in doing this or it's not scratching the same itch for me or I just fucking hate this. I don't wanna be thinking like this. I don't wanna be, you know, engaging in this same type of behavior. This could even be related to like going to a job. You might just get fed up with it and you can certainly classify that as kind of this weird addiction we have with how we make money and how we pay our bills and how we're responsible and the standard and quality of life that we need to adhere to to, you know, meet the image of what we would like to be.

These are all things related to addiction. Of course, there is classic addiction, right? We can talk about substance abuse. I, and I say abuse in the sense that like, you don't want it's fucking you or someone in your life up in a way, physically, emotionally, mentally, psychologically, or you're just like, fuck, I don't, like you can't control it. It feels like something that's out of your control. That's where I'm kinda going in the realm of addiction 'cause we all have thoughts like that too. Some people call them intrusive thoughts, right? You know, I sort of swerve my car off the bridge here or, you know, some weird kind of thing that comes in.

I read that somewhere in fairness. There have been those type of intrusive thoughts you're just driving. You're like, what would happen if I just swerved into this? You never are doing it. It's not a real thought, but it's something that comes in. But when those thoughts cease to be intermittent and they come in at rapid speeds and they alter your behavior and your thinking and your relationships, then we're dealing with an issue, right? And if we're dealing with that, we certainly wanna have something that we can use or practice or try to help us break free of the cycle of addiction. And addiction, again, does not need to be some physical thing that you are engaging in.

I truly believe people have addictive thoughts. They have addictive habits of mind that kind of reinforce and breed themselves. I think one of the cycles that you see are hallmarks for people who are addicted to various substances, chemicals, whatever it is. And I know when I say that, I think people usually think of the most addictive thing, heroin or opiates or going on a meth binge, but we're finding out now that people have been on SSRIs for years. By the way, no shame if you're on an SSRI. This is not to be pejorative towards people or an antidepressants. I was put on when I was in middle school, dexadrin, which is if you know what Adderall is like, imagine dexadrin, it's just speedier.

And I was on this from around ages 11, 12 to I think 15, something like that. No appetite, sped up all day, can focus like a motherfucker, but just like it's drugs, right? And so I get sometimes we get on these things because it seems like the right thing to do. I think I was on Ritalin for a year and you know, I got off these things and was fine. I was even put on lithium for three years because I had kind of a weird spiritual whoopsie do, which is, it was fine. It was just kind of like a very elevated way of being. I didn't know how to sustain it, came crashing back, I've spoken about all this.

Psychosis and synchronicity episode for people wanna hear about that. But anyway, got diagnosed as bipolar at that point, took lithium for three years. And then one point I was like, you know, am I really bipolar? Is this really a thing? Let's see. Like I know I can recognize when I have more energy than other times, but like is that what really went off the deep end? So I spoke to a psychologist or psychiatrist who was prescribing this to me. I was in New York, spoke to my family, said, you know, I just wanna try going off this and seeing how it works. Like I don't wanna let people know so I'm doing this in the right way.

I'm not just flushing meds down the toilet 'cause I had a thought. I'm really committing to this. Got off the lithium, that was, I mean, 2008, 2009. It's been 15 years. I've not led a perfect life. I'm not like Mr. Stable person all of the time, but like doing good, definitely not doing bad. Definitely handling everything life can throw at an individual, right? Everyone's good, my family is good. I am good, everyone is healthy, right? Like, I don't know what else to say. So it's just, I understand we have relationships to some of even the prescribed medications. You know, we'll exclude opiates for now just because of that whole fucking corporal pharma.

Not good, but the antidepressants now, people are coming off these things or trying to and noticing major symptoms of withdrawal. It's like, holy shit. Because I think what we're trying to treat at the end of the day, whether it is through a substance or a behavior or repetitive thoughts, like we're trying to get away from something. We're trying to distance ourselves from a truth that may be difficult to ascertain and also fully realize, right? What I mean by that is like, what is your relationship to life? Like, what is going on here? And it's okay to be confused. It's okay to be frightened. It's okay to be like, I have no fucking idea what was going on.

I think most people feel like that all of the time. What I personally think is happening right now is people are purging all addictions. I don't mean that they're not gonna be addicted to things in the future. I just mean people are really examining everything that is addictive in their life. Of course, let's include social media scrolling and phone stuff, like what the fuck? I think personally, that's a big part of why this has evolved, is it's getting people to look at this behavior and be like, do I even wanna be doing this? Do I even wanna be on my phone, doom scrolling? Why am I doing this?

What is the reason? And yes, you can go for the physiological reasons. You can say dopamine, it's just dopamine. They're just these corporations, these algorithms have figured out how to maximize pleasurable feelings, no different than an opiate will. And this is what they are going to rely on as a tactic, but I think it's a little deeper than that. I'm not someone for better or worse who is a full fundamentalist scientific materialist, so I don't think it's just dopamine. I think we're watching the effect of some energetic activity taking place. What's the activity? We wanna feel secure. We wanna feel good.

We wanna have our mind focused on something where it doesn't necessarily require what feels like a tremendous amount of exertion continuously. That's a very difficult space to live in. It doesn't mean you don't exercise exertion ever, right? In the same way, if you're exercising, you may do a really intense workout three to five times a week. You're not doing it every day, all day long, unless you're like living in the jungle or something. No, even then, they rest. People rest in the jungle. Even if you're climbing a mountain, there's sites where you say, you don't do it all the time is my point.

But what happens is if we get into a point where that what feels like rest actually becomes exertion, this is when the addiction takes over your kind of base operating system here. Then we start getting into a weird grounds and it's easy to otherwise in this situation and justify and say, well, you know what? There, well, this person is doing it more than me. I'm not doing it the most, certainly. I only do it for this amount of time in my life. And it's, you know, that's not so bad. There are other people at worst. Then you're definitely going down the slope, right? Of any addictive behavior. Then you're justifying, then you're rationalizing.

It's not that justifying and rationalizing are so bad all the time, every time. It's just, if you don't really wanna be doing the thing and you're still doing it, and that's how you're kind of getting around it through justification and rationalization, then it's like maybe re-examine, maybe take another look at what you're doing. Now, the cool thing is, I think what a lot of us are kind of have and will probably continue to do on some level, right, is use addictive behavior to not deal with something, right? This can be pain, this can be trauma, this could just be awareness, nothing more. Just being fully present, just being aware of how you feel and potentially why you feel like that.

But it can also be just like the awareness that you're kind of creating your life. And this doesn't mean there isn't a higher power. I think I've been explicit on that, but that you are an active co-creator, right, of your life. Your perception truly reveals and shows you aspects of reality. I mentioned this on the latest bonus episode. Started a course in miracles, super good. You have a weird relationship with Jesus and God, capital G, probably gonna be difficult, but it's pretty dope. I gotta say, fit same with all the other metaphysical stuff that I've experienced in this life and found to be true.

But anyway, I do think the addiction purge is coming. I think it is going to be felt by pretty much everyone where you are forced to examine and look at aspects of your life and really take like a true self-assessment and be like, is this something I want? Do I enjoy this? Do I want to do it? Is there something else I enjoy? Can I replace it with that? Are there things I can try out, new experiences, new... A lot of this stuff is just set and setting too, changing habits, changing things that you're doing, right? That's kind of how the addictive cycle is broken. And I'm sure you can look at plenty of things in your life where you broke free of certain thought patterns, of certain behaviors, of certain activities.

Even if not forever, you don't have to look at this like a binary thing. I think that's one of the things that can get lost when it comes to when we're talking about things like addiction, it's not like you're either an addict or you're not. I know a lot of people self-identify and categorize themselves as addicts and they cannot touch certain substances, certain behaviors, certain activities where they will "fall off the wagon" and get back. And I know for a lot of people related to alcohol and things like that, that's a huge bugaboo. I'm not here to invalidate your experience. My conception of that is an identity that you choose to associate with if it feels resonant and it helps you, fuck yeah, amazing.

But I don't think that's the only way it works. I don't, addiction as a disease, I think you can look at hallmarks and the qualifications like according to the psychological elements and hallmarks that make up someone who would self-identify or be categorized as an addict. But I don't think that's really the whole picture. Again, and it's not like there's some nefarious reason that this is how things work that we're doing the best we can. We try to create systems and centers of belief that help explain why things are the way they are. If you look at someone and they're talking to people who aren't there and screaming at them and getting frayed and fearful of it, you're gonna say, well, you know what, maybe this person is exhibiting elements of schizophrenia unless they just happen to take DMT and freak out for five minutes.

This is a prolonged thing. You may say like this person is exhibiting signs of this mental illness. I just think we need to be careful with how we categorize some of these things. I think this is another reason that a figure like Kanye West kind of becomes like the bipolar person's champion. Not, I don't mean that say like you have to be bipolar or all bipolar people love him, but they see him saying things like, you know, my bipolarism is a superpower. And then both at times accepting and rejecting that diagnosis. And at the end of the day, like, if he's not hurting himself, if he's not hurting other people, truly, I know you could be like, well, he said all these things about Jewish people.

It's like that, I don't think that really escalated people's inborn anti-Semitism to the degree that people, maybe it is. Maybe if everyone was saying that all the time, it would be a dangerous situation. I just didn't see it. And as someone who was born Jewish, you know, the fucks with Jewish people like, you know, that's fine. Like, come on, it is what it is. If he makes a bop, it's a bop. The latest album is all right, it's all right. It's all right. But you know what I mean? I think people kind of like see a public famous celebrity dealing with issues of mental wellness, mental health. And that can be like a very empowering thing because they can say, well, look, this person is successful.

Yeah, he may be acting a little bit weird or wild right now, but you know, like that's his personality. And you know, do you have to be a great and famous artist to be able to exist in a world and be a little bit tipsy-topsy sometimes? No, you don't. You just gotta know the limits and the edge of what's going on. And if you notice yourself being in positions that you don't enjoy, I mean, that's what are we doing here? Is that not addiction, right? And so you can look at like behaviors and thought patterns in the same way as, you know, substances or, you know, sex or things like that, like it's the same activity that's going on.

Now, some of this is diminishing returns when it comes to addiction, because the same kind of dopamine or hit you get from engaging in a behavior or activity or substance tends to diminish over time. Those neurotransmitters, we'll get into the neuropsych, you know, the biology of this a little bit, are going to be grooved and they're not going to hit you the same way, right? It's just not going to feel the same. So you may look to engage in other behaviors that are maybe increasingly more risky or dangerous or whatever you want to call them, that becomes kind of an issue. And it also means you're moving away from perhaps the key reason that the addiction has shown up in your life, which to me is to show you kind of what is and what isn't working.

There's a functionality to addictive behavior, right? If you are someone who cannot take a drink, because every time you take a drink, you lose your shit, can't stop drinking and become an alcoholic, right? It's worth it to know that about yourself, you know what I mean? Like that is self-awareness and it may need to get to the point where it's kind of dark and kind of like scary for you to recognize that and really take it seriously. But if that is your pattern of behavior and it's truly something you can't alter, it's not like, well, you know what? I'm going to get to a place where I can just have one drink and if you know you can't do that and you need to get to a certain place of awareness to deal with that, you will get placed there.

That experience will happen for you. It may be harsh, it may not be, right? If you're someone who can't go a day without, you know, thinking about sex or masturbating constantly or not even though that's a bad thing, that's my point. I'm just saying, can you take it? I've been a 14 year old boy before 'cause he's like, that's what you do. Anyway, my point is that if this is something where you can't get other things done or it's taking over your life and it feels like it's kind of filling the void of something else, maybe it's meant to make you look at what void is it potentially filling? What feelings are you trying to escape?

What aren't you dealing with? You can run that out for your entire life. You can run away from those feelings and those kind of situations and those truths and those realities, but I don't recommend it. I haven't lived out my entire life yet, but I'm not young, I'm 40, right? So I'm gonna be 41 in July. Like I can tell you can't really outrun things that you're psyche and you're unconscious even are aware of. And if these are things you're not dealing with and behaviors and patterns and stressors and anxieties and you're not sitting with them and allowing them to come up and then also just being very gentle with yourself and recognizing this world that we find ourself in can be confusing, stressful, difficult, not fun and really just fucking like shitty sometimes.

Feels like, because there is a lot of confusion. There is a lot, if you think like, if you put all these individuated consciousnesses in a place, didn't really tell anyone what the fuck was going on, let them kind of create their own thing, that's what this is. And I commend for the most part, we're doing a pretty good job. There are some spots we could clean up for sure. This is not a, we're not a plus in this bitch, but I would give us a solid B, maybe B minus, just 'cause I do think we could make some major improvements here with some simple changes, but you know, I'm not running for president of the world, right?

Who was it who said they were running? It was the, I saw the we crashed, the we work thing. Good, many serious, I didn't know that was Jared Leto. What, he really transferred, it was cool. Anyway, good, good show, this Apple Plus might be Apple Plus, and you know, there's some point where he's talking about being the president of the world and living to be like a trillion, you know, he's smoking weed, man, and being a CEO of a $47 billion valuation company, he didn't know any better, and like this stuff gets out, and people are like, you're insane, kind of, and then they did this weird thing for the IPO.

Anyway, good series, check it out. I'm not applying for president of the world, I don't think I'm going to live to be a trillion, nor would I want to, so I can talk about these things freely. I've also proven a clear, non-giving a fuck of making people angry by the things I say. I'm pretty sure people who have stuck around know at this point that I was never a Trump supporter, I was never an anti-vaxxer, all things that have been hurled at me over the years, just because I don't really look at it through, that's so binary, and we are clearly moving to this wishy, washing, not in a bad way, but like spectromy, nebulous, like, choose your own identities type of world.

That's what it seems like. It seems like the people who are figuring this out are also figuring out how to be relatively successful in various areas of their life. You see this with TikTok. The TikTok band, by the way, I love how, I'm like, "Yo, I'm going to get into this thing." TikTok, they seem to be paying, which they are. I'm going to crack the code here, kind of crack the code, and then all of a sudden, they're like, "Yo, we got to shut fucking TikTok down. "What's going on there?" I will see this, people are taking it both seriously and un-seriously. Past the Congress, if it gets through the Senate, it's a done deal.

TikTok, by, by, they're trying to force the Chinese investors by dance who are allegedly associated with the Communist Chinese Party to divest, which they can't even legally do in China. They can't just give up intellectual property to a foreign country, they don't do that shit, right? So it would really mean TikTok is gone, which would be a shame. Enjoy TikTok. And I don't think it's like people wouldn't be scrolling. What it would do is enhance the United States, potential surveillance system through Google, meta, Amazon, whatever. Anyway, weird and wild shit, we don't have to worry about. I just, I do encourage people, if addictive themes are presenting themselves to you and your life.

This is obviously an Evergreen episode. Like this, I hope people come here when they're dealing with addiction and they recognize, and I'm not here giving you a magic bullet, like imagine your addiction away, okay? You know what I mean? Is that ultimately what we kind of do when we recognize addiction and feel that we don't want to have that relationship with anything in our life? Yeah, we kind of do. We imagine ourselves being a different person who doesn't have that relationship. But that may mean abstaining from that behavior, substance or whatever it is, because you know you can't do it. That's a realization, that's fine.

There's nothing wrong with that, okay? But it doesn't necessarily mean that. That's for you to imagine yourself to be the person you need to be and do the things that you need to do to be healthy. Like I said, this place is tough sometimes. So you want to kind of be in the best physical, psychological, emotional, you know, spiritual shape of your life. I think that will behoove many people. I think that's why self-care has become kind of like a cultural meme and kind of perverted in a sense. Unfortunately, in some cases, but like people wanted to take care of themselves because they feel they know they will be more prepared to deal with kind of life's trials and tribulation.

That's an inherent kind of unconscious thought that all of us realize is probably true. Not like if we'd be in the worst fucking possible state emotionally psychologically and physically to deal with the hardest problems in my life. That doesn't sound like if you looked at like an animal in the wild, it's like torn to shreds, bacterial infections, you know, can't do anything. And then like the harsh winter comes, it's like, that one's gonna really make, doesn't seem like they're set up for success. So identify the places in your life, you can tighten up and be honest with yourself. That's really what's required.

It's not a magic bullet of, oh, do the imaginal exercise. Yes, of course you can apply them to areas of your life or addictive behavior, but more, it's more about kind of trusting yourself, really paying attention to the mental diet stuff, the thoughts and feelings that you are giving to yourself regularly will truly create an impact, how you experience this world more than anything else. If you take away nothing from any of this stuff, know that's true, right? And if you are telling yourself thoughts and feelings, they're coming and you can't stop them and you have this weird relationship, you can say enough is enough.

You can let those feelings come, you know what, come this time, I'm not reacting the same way. I'm done with that behavior. That's kind of a decision that's made. And if you ask any like recovering addict from whatever their addiction was, they'll tell you that. They'll say, I was done, I didn't wanna feel like this. The same thing you'll find in people who move careers, by the way, they're like, I just couldn't do it anymore. I don't wanna do it, didn't feel right. I was lying to myself, I felt like I was wasting my life, wasting my potential, didn't wanna do these things, I couldn't do it anymore.

That creates change. It's unfortunate that sometimes we have to get to those places to like, have that be a thing, but it is, anyway, fun episode. But I do think it will be useful for a lot of people. I just see this purge kind of happening for the duration of this year. It could be an addiction to a poverty mindset or you know, an ego trip or whatever it is. This is not like one size fits all addiction, but I think a lot of people are having these things come up. It could be addiction to wellness. It could be addiction to like, you know, being so healthy, like you're not even looking at certain aspects of your life that you also need to be healthy in, right?

There's plenty of things that you can look at. I don't know many people who are like, completely addiction free. And again, addiction is not doing something you like a lot. Okay, you're not necessarily addicted to the gym if you go every day, right? And it's probably one of the better addictions to have, right, assuming you're not using steroids, but I don't know, steroids are like, it's like a thing now. Apparently, that's just like what people are like, yeah, I'm using trend, bro, get big. It's like, cool. Isn't that like shrinking your testicles and making you weird? Doesn't seem like a great trade off, but okay, whatever.

But yeah, I mean, again, addiction does not have to be what you would classically think an addiction would look like. Obsessive thinking could be classified as an addiction. Now, if you're OCD, I'm not saying that like, you're addicted to being OCD, you may have patterns and things that that is just the way you are wired. And there's no shame in it. And I'm not suggesting that you need to change to be a complete or whole person. It's just in the areas that you really truly identify. You're like, this isn't working for me. This isn't working for me. And this is something that could potentially change, right?

If you're like, it's not like you don't have legs and you're addicted to not having legs and you just decide I'm gonna grow legs and your legs come back. That's not what I'm suggesting. What I'm suggesting is this is something that, you know, with this is within the realm of you changing. It may seem incredibly difficult, if not impossible, but you could do it. You could really do it. It's a possibility, right? That's what I'm talking about when it comes to addiction. If you are diagnosed with a certain disease that is truly incurable and you got no shot, you're not addicted to dying. It's not what I'm saying at all, okay?

That's probably some other thing that is a different challenge that I'm sure many people will deal with in the course of their lives. You know, there's a famous, you know, example of the Saint Ramakrishna, super famous, Saint died of apparently pretty horrible cancer. And people were like, yo, like what the fuck? And he's like, you know, it's this karma from this past thing. It's not painful. And he would still go into these states of samadhi and, you know, be in a state of bliss even with this horrible cancer that was like racking his body. You don't know why the things happen. It's how you deal with them and your ability to deal with them that truly like determine the results, okay?

Don't necessarily put your perception, what you are seeing as the final truth on everything. It is some level of truth for you, but it is truly a multi-perspectival view. Are you seeing it from all the angles? Probably not. People rarely do. It's not the easiest thing to do. See things from all angles possible. So anyway, bonus episodes on the Patreon. Things are going strong over there. I'm going to Turkey mid-May to mid-June. I'm gonna record some stuff in advance so I have those ready to go. So don't worry about episodes. And then I will be in Turkey again from like late July to probably late August.

So yeah, those things are happening. I usually get episodes out and all content out regularly. The only thing that may change is the live streams 'cause sometimes just where I'm at. There probably won't be a thing the first time I go, but the second time I go, you know, if you're on a boat, it's sometimes hard to get wifi for stable live connections. That's the only thing will change. Crypto shit is crypto shit. I am doing these live webinars every month. There will be one in April and May. You know, I don't know what to say anymore guys. I'm trying to invite people into the Discord, which you do get access for life if you join the Patreon.

There are opportunities. They don't come around all the time. It seems to be about every four to five years in crypto where there's kind of a chance to do some stuff. If that is appealing to you, even in the slightest, I do these live webinars so you can find out what is going on. Is it a scam? Is it a Ponzi scheme? Is this just some crazy thing where everyone's a liar and everyone's getting hacked and scammed all the time? The answer is no, obviously. I wouldn't talk about it constantly if that was the case. Doesn't mean those things don't happen. Of course they happen. It's happened to me, it's happened to many people.

Is the way it is. But it is a cool opportunity. So if it speaks to you, you can find those. Everything is on my stand store. Anything I'm doing. There's a crypto course, there's crypto webinars. There are meditation, I say meditation. You say it like there's meditations. There's one meditation now that's available. There will be others. There is a 20-day printed home journal for this stuff. I'm doing stuff. It's out there. You can find it anyway. Fun times, I will see you next week. Bye bye. [MUSIC PLAYING] ♪ All the time ♪ ♪ I will not worry for you ♪ ♪ You'll be just fine ♪ ♪ Take my thoughts with you ♪ ♪ And when you look behind ♪ ♪ You will surely see a face that you recognize ♪ ♪ Open your mind ♪ ♪ And not alone ♪ [MUSIC PLAYING]

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