Ep. 59 - Jay Weingarten Redux

This episode of Synchronicity is brought to you by EatDreamB.com. Let me tell you what EatDreamB.com is. First of all, it's a lovely website. Go check it out. Hearty and Paul are wonderful guys. They've graciously sponsored this podcast. So support these guys. Let me tell you about the Apple Camomail Dream Bar, which I have a 12-pack for. So I'm just gonna tell you exactly how I've used them in the past two weeks since I've had the Dream bars. Number one, late at night, when I got the Munchies, I ate a Dream bar. It's healthy, it's delicious. And I don't eat things that I shouldn't be eating late at night.

Number two, here's a little tip for you people on the go. My wife Alexis, she swears by the Dream bar. She actually now is keeping them in the diaper bag for our son Eli, because when you are on the go and you need something to eat, but you don't wanna go get something not good for you, it's a quick way to satiate your hunger. Now, let me tell you what the other thing about the Dream bar, which I find to be perhaps the most important part of it, it's a calming, relaxing treat. So like I said, I get the Apple Camomail bars, a Camomail, as you, who doesn't like Camomail tea, right? I mean, come on, it's delicious, it relaxes you.

Well, I don't know Camomail. Would I class with my Camomail tea as delicious? No, but it's soothing, but I will say that Apple Camomail Dream bars are delicious. So once again, check them out. edreamb.com/sync, S-Y-N-C, you get a special offer, just for you, for listening to this podcast. So thanks a lot to the guys at edreamb.com, and please go pick up some Dream bars today. Thanks guys, and here's the episode. (upbeat music)

Dude, look at suffering as almost a psychedelic experience. (upbeat music) (upbeat music)

Welcome to Synchronous, wait, I didn't do that, right? But I'm gonna keep it rolling. Welcome to Synchronous, wait, (laughs) we're really getting off to a great start this week. Welcome to episode 59 of Synchronicity. My guest this week is Jay Winegarten. Jay's been on the show before, this is his return visit. So welcome Jay back, everyone. Give him a nice clapping wherever you're listening to. We're gonna get to Jay in just a second. We had a great conversation, but we were there. But I got some of those little talk about, right? Oh god. I wanna talk about a little bit about what's, I know this is probably what?

The third week we're talking about politics, or I'm talking about we, I'm talking about politics in the beginning of this podcast. But I still think it's kind of everything is still kind of right, right? We're still seeing all this inflammatory and conflict driven stuff. I mean, Donald Trump, hmm, that's an interesting name for him, Donald Trump. We're still seeing him send out tweets distracting, or not distracting, or just reacting, whatever it is. And it's a whole big thing. And a lot of people are describing it as a post fact era, where the post truth era, where it doesn't actually matter if you tell the truth, if you repeat yourself and say things and rally people, and then portray the media as not telling the truth, it doesn't matter what you say.

It doesn't have to be true, which is a scary concept, but kind of closer to what the nature of reality is anyway. I mean, us trying to define certain things with facts is not always the easiest thing to do. Anyway, my point is, is we have to figure out a better way collectively, and individually, to talk to people who don't agree with us. And I think I've mentioned it, maybe I haven't on this podcast before, but if you're looking for someone with really, really helpful, practical, excellent advice and ways to look at the situation, it's not me, but it is this guy, Van Jones, just tuning into what he's doing.

He's quickly becoming a modern day mystic in my eyes. I just saw him give a wonderful speech at the Dakota Access Pipeline protest, where he was basically saying, "Listen, "you guys are digging up death, "that's what you guys are doing, that's what oil is, "it's death, it's been dead for millions of years, "and you're digging it up, and it creates more death, "there's spills, it creates asthma, "it creates carbon monoxide, it's pollution." And he's like, "What did you expect was gonna happen?" And he started laying out all of these wonderful, symbolic gestures of how we need to get in touch with the sun.

Not only is an energy source, but as a metaphor, right? I mean, if you look through any of the Abrahamic religions, many other ones, even going through the cults of like Osiris, the Egyptian stuff, the sun symbolically is a very, very transformative figure. And he also talks about the wind, you know? And the wind, again, is a very mystical and symbolic figure or energy, Hanuman, right? I chant a Hanuman every single day, the Hanuman chalisa is the wind, son of the wind, Anjanaiah. Jesus is often spoken about as the wind whispering through, and I believe that's kind of what his consciousness is all about.

So Van Jones, just tune into him. He's not only talking about things that are important, but he's trying to engage people who don't agree with him or share his viewpoints in a really compassionate way. So just tune into Van Jones. As a reminder, if you wanna, I'm posting a lot of this stuff in the Synchronicity Facebook community. If you wanna get involved, we're close to 250 people right now, as I'm recording this on November 29th. Check it out, like we're having a good time in there, and I'm posting that Van Jones thing I mentioned, it's in there. So you can find that on the website, singpodcast.com, S-Y-N-C, podcast.com.

It's in the menu, find it on Facebook, the group, it's cool. It's a closed group, so I'll need to approve you, but I approve you, so just ask to come in. Okay, right, and now, look, I am now looking. Oh, here it is, I couldn't understand what my writing was. I've jotted down my little notes. Here's a couple of other things that I checked out in the past few weeks that I think you guys might enjoy. If you have access to it, wink, wink, nod, nod, and you're not in the UK, planet Earth 2. Oh my God, it's incredible. I made the mistake of, well, not the mistake. I had some edible marijuana on a bus trip up to New York recently, and I put on planet Earth 2, and oh, let's say I had a little bit too much edible marijuana, I was tearing up.

I mean, this down the bus, I had sunglasses on so no one could see me doing it. I tried to do one of those fake yawns, like were you yawn, maybe your eyes were watering, but it's not, you're actually, you're crying because you're watching planet Earth 2 on a bus. Luckily, there was no one sitting next to me, so it wasn't like a total catastrophe. But man, this is some moving stuff. We gotta protect this planet. This goes right in line with the Dakota Access Pipeline. Listen, all of this stuff that's going on right now, you gotta pick and choose what you wanna get involved with. I personally think right now, this Dakota Access Pipeline protest stuff is so incredibly important.

Pay attention to it because the Native Americans have been marginalized and taken advantage of right forever in this country and our modern country of the United States. So the fact that it's still happening, and it's happening in such a horrible way. I mean, they're shooting these people with non-lethal weapons, quote unquote, but it's causing real harm, and they just don't want their water to potentially be poisoned, and it's not too dissimilar to what the residents near Bismarck, they didn't want the pipeline there. Not to mention, I was reading about it, most of this oil isn't even going to the United States, it's exported to other places.

So it's really putting, it's a really tough situation, tune into it. There's ways to help, whether through donations, whether getting involved, whether talking about it, whether putting pressure on Congress people, senators, really, this is an issue that I think we should be tuning into, not necessarily Donald Trump's tweets. But listen, there's our interest thing too. Another thing I saw, also very emotional, that's called the Segway people, more it's not called the Segway, 'cause it's not a Segway, finding Dory. Oh my God, this is an emotional roller coaster, and I'm very mad at all of you for not warning me that this was such a, Jesus man, great movie, but these pics are movies, really, they tug at the heartstrings there.

And then finally, Westworld, start watching Westworld. It's incredible, a multi-layered, multi-faceted, brilliantly acted, just a fantastic show. Touching on so many amazing concepts, the intersection of artificial intelligence and human consciousness, what is consciousness? Just so many, ah, it's great, just watch the show. I love when you're watching something and the production value I just, you can tell there's so much behind this show, which admittedly, the original Westworld, written by Michael Crichton was kind of a campy, ridiculous movie about a West spaghetti, Western set with killer robots.

This is not, I mean, that's not, it's kind of what's happening in Westworld, but really, just check that out. Really, really, really awesome. Okay, let's get to Jay, right? I've rambled on long enough. That was quite a little bit, sorry, Fellows. And what's the, what's the, the feminine Fellows? I don't know, someone write it right, write to me at no@syncpodcast.com. Let me know what the feminine version of Fellows is. I would like to know, ladies? I don't know. Jay, okay, Jay, we originally had this podcast scheduled a couple of weeks, it was actually scheduled the day after the presidential elections.

And Jay and I were both anticipating a Hillary victory. I think as most people were paying attention to the polls, were, and that didn't happen. And Jay hit me up the next day. It's okay, man, I don't know if I can do this. I'm pretty down, like, I don't know how to process this. And I was like, yeah, I totally understand. I semi-tried to cajole him into doing it, saying that it might be cathartic to talk about it. But it really wasn't in the right space to talk about it. So, and I get that. A lot of my friends still aren't in the right space to really talk about it. But Jay got, I don't wanna say he got over it, but he figured out a way to kind of transmute that, what he was experiencing.

A, into something that I'll read at the beginning of the episode that he wrote and posted on Facebook, which is just a really heartfelt and genuine, like, oh, beautiful, beautiful stuff from him, which is so dissimilar to what he normally puts on social media, which is this kind of a reverent, silly goofy persona, which is one of the great things about this episode. If you follow Jay's comedy, which you can find at jyongarden.horse, that's his website, you can, you don't really get a sense for the person necessarily underneath the persona. So it was really great to be able to talk to him. I've spoken to Jay, obviously, off podcast, and he's not doing his big bit and stick with me.

Really deep guy, really just, you can tell he feels things very intensely. He talks about when he was going through some difficult times how it was very just like, you know, when after a breakup or a professional thing, like it can be really hard for him to feel funny and be funny, which I think is probably gotta be one of the most challenging things about being a comedian, is having to potentially be the person who makes people laugh during times where maybe people aren't, you know, not necessarily in the mood to laugh, but aren't ready to laugh, who knows? So we delve into kind of this intersection of comedy and, you know, making people feel a certain way or attempting to get some resonance out of them.

You know what, here's the thing. I could talk about this conversation at nauseam, and I could basically recap the whole thing. Why don't you just listen to it? Jay's awesome, his comedy is great. He's a really deep and interesting fellow, and I don't have to use the feminine there 'cause he's a guy, just listen to the episode. I'm gonna cut it off right here and get you to it. So without further ado, here is Jay Winegarden. (gentle music) Thank you, by the way, for coming on. Again, I always love repeat guests, especially when they're funny and fun like you, so thank you for coming on.

Thank you for having me.

My pleasure. So we spoke about this a couple of times before, and we decided this would be a decent place to start, given the current climate with the election stuff, but not wanting to dwell on it and get people kind of in a somber state of mind, but I wanna start for the listeners with a post that you wrote on Facebook. And I'll preface this by saying that anyone who follows Jay on Facebook, Twitter, any other social media, including his website, it's a very irreverent and kind of fun, funny place to be, and you don't see very quote unquote serious posts, so I will preface that. So I'm gonna read your statement.

I don't know if I'm gonna read the whole thing. I'm gonna link to it on the podcast page, but I wanna give people an idea of kind of what you wrote. I guess it was almost a week after the election, and after we had spoken, we had a podcast scheduled the day after the election, and I think you and I both thought like, "Oh, Hillary, will we elect it?" And like, we'll just talk about like, "Hey, first woman president, just talk about fun stuff," and obviously that changed. So I'm gonna read this for you listeners right here. So this is Jay. I've never written any real thoughts on Facebook, except a couple years ago when my sister got engaged, and I think people thought I was joking around, so please bear with me as I try something different.

I believe we are here on this earth to maintain a quiet mind, to keep our hearts wide open and to relieve suffering. It is critical right now that we give our time, money, energy, and presence towards alleviating suffering that is happening to marginalized and oppressed people all around us all the time. I stand strongly with immigrants, Latinos, African Americans, the LGBTQ community, women, low-income individuals, Muslims, Jews, people who are physically and or mentally challenged, and everyone else who feels afraid about our current time. So many of us are filled with fear, consumed by a nasty ego that creates an illusion of separateness.

I think that this separateness, along with our desire for oneness, is the root cause of our constant suffering. And when we look at the earth and at the way that other beings are practicing, we feel that they are living their lives with eyes closed, and we strongly feel the pain that stems from their lack of awareness. I believe that all around us are billions of souls at every level of incarnation imaginable. To know during which lifetime one will awaken from a sleep walk is impossible. Because so many individuals continue to live after life, causing immense harm to others, we must respond to this challenge and do what we can to help those in need.

And this is difficult work because when you truly open your heart to someone who is suffering, you experience tremendous pain. So many people decide to respond with their ego and pull away when they get in the presence of suffering because they can't handle it. But more than ever, we have to keep our hearts wide open. Because when we experience this pain, we begin to realize that there is no them. There is only us. When you reach this point, you are beyond your ego and you just can't turn away anymore. I want to thank you all and say it is a real honor to live with you in this incarnation and to help each other awaken.

Yes, it is important to remember we are each other's vehicles for awakening. We are all training to become free. Lastly, I'd like to say, I am always here to listen to anyone's fears or anxieties. So please feel free to send me a personal message at any time. I'm learning a lot about having conversations with people and I want to continue to connect. I offer my ears to anyone who feels alone. I'm here, I'm listening, and I stand with you. I love you all more than you could ever know. May we keep our hearts wide open and work to relieve those who are suffering. May we all play our part in the engine of love, healing, and understanding.

And then you provide some links to ways that people can help, which I don't want to get lost here. So this is obviously, incredibly atypical of the type of things that you share. And I'm sure for everyone listening, they realize just incredibly how poignant and thoughtful that statement was. So can you tell me just a little bit about how the election impacted you, kind of how you were feeling, and why you felt compelled to write something like this, which is quote unquote a break in character for you online.

Yeah, well, thanks for sharing all that. And yeah, I guess how I felt was... Is that a dog?

Yeah, that's my dog, Mayseo. How's the baby, by the way?

She's great.

She's right next to me right now. She is a beautiful, beautiful girl, I've had her for eight months now, and I'm sad because I'll be leaving her for about three weeks coming up.

To go on your tour.

And that's going to be... Yeah, I've never been away from her for more than a night. So I'm a little sad, but at the same time, I can't wait to see her after getting back, you know?

Yeah, no. I mean, it's always sad. I just left Eli, my son, for two days. And that's pretty sad. But you gotta go make money for the baby. You gotta go, daddy's gotta work. (laughing) But to go back, if Mayseo barks again, I'll put him away. But yeah, to go back to what you were saying about the election and everything.

Yeah, I guess after the initial wedding of shock, I was just subsided, 'cause yeah, I also thought that our podcast, we would just be sort of having a light-hearted and joyous discussion the next day and feeling positive and just sort of like... I mean, at least not being really unable to talk. So after that started to kind of not become as overwhelming, I mean, I was looking at social media and I think it was a strange time to be on social media. A lot of, I mean, people were very transparent about their fears and a lot of people were, you know, panicking and also just very angry. I think that was the most common emotion and I guess when I wanted to say something, but I didn't wanna, I don't know, I guess that's sort of how I always approach everything.

I just wanted to do something the opposite of how most people are responding to something. And I guess that's probably why I express myself the way I do online normally or (laughs) there's a lot of different reasons for that, but the point is I wanted to bring some sort of new perspective and really speak from the heart. And you know, I was, I spent a lot of time alone and thinking and yeah, I spent a few days rewriting this post and I just wanted to provide some sort of hope and my support just to say that, you know, no matter what happens, there will be people who will care deeply and who will be there to help, you know, help out.

And I guess I didn't see that coming out. I mean, I know there were certainly people who naturally, you know, wanted to step up but I didn't think there was enough of that and so I just wanted to kind of be so that I could.

Well, I mean, and I think that is, if more people did that, I think we'd be a lot better off and I hear what you're saying. Not dissimilar in a way when I see a lot of people doing something at the very least, it's kind of like a wake up call to be like, "Well, what exactly is going on here?" It's not that because everyone doing is doing something or reacting a certain way, there's something wrong with it but your curiosity is peace to examine what's going on and I like you. I noticed the same thing. It's why I did a bonus podcast talking about this stuff, not because I think I have the level of political acumen to provide some cohesive analysis of what's going on but to provide some alternative perspectives to what I saw too and still continue to see just to be clear, which is an overflowing of negativity, fear, anger, hatred on both sides, you know?

And like some of it, obviously like, you know, this Nazi stuff, Steve Bannon, Richard Spencer, alt-right stuff is legitimately terrifying that this stuff is in any way being normalized. I saw, I was dying laughing with my sister last night because we were looking at the CNN headline that says, you know, "Are Jews people?" And it's like, "Are Jews people?" Like, I didn't know this is a question we were supposed to be asking and obviously there's a level of comedy to it but it's also like they're actually putting that on CNN. So when you share something like that, not only is it a way for you to kind of process what's going on around you but it also becomes kind of a prism that other people can look to and see, you know, some other way of dealing with something which let's be clear, I think like part of the issue with how we got here is that we're at this crazy point in time where like, you pretty much can't, if you disagree with someone at this point over the election, like they're almost your enemy, you know?

It's tearing families apart, friends are, you know, it's just crazy what we lost the ability to engage with each other, you know, and disagree without like totally being, you know, at each other's throats. So, I mean, I think it was super awesome and I mean, like I know in speaking with you the day after, we're like, we don't know if we're gonna do this or not, like you were definitely going through those things but now like when we were just talking before this one, like, you know, and seeing how you've gotten back on social media and doing kind of your regular thing, like, you know, how, what became the turning point for you?

Was it this post? Was it thinking about it? But how did you kind of get through? Not saying it's like done, you're not upset about anything but like, how did you, what was the turning point for like kind of processing and integrating it in, like figuring out how you want to move forward with this stuff?

I don't know, yeah, I guess I wanted to sort of take a moment of silence for a period and I think, you know, my way of expressing myself can, I didn't, you know, I didn't, first of all, feel like, like I'm only able to do what I do when I'm feeling good.

Right, right, we spoke about that, yeah.

So, yeah, I couldn't really do much. I was feeling pretty depressed and yeah, that took a while to be able to get back to work and I also just thought, you know, it wasn't what people needed at that time.

Right, I didn't think it would make sense and I couldn't do it, so yeah, I just wanted to take a moment of silence and then, you know, I did feel, I mean, I guess I had been feeling this desire because I feel like so few people actually, like, understand what I'm trying to do, I just based on like a lot of questions again and things like that.

Like what questions, what questions?

Oh, I mean, it's, I don't know, I don't want to get too up topic, but just, yeah, it's very clear to me that a lot of people don't understand like what I'm doing, a lot, it's, and it's interesting to me, but yeah, people like, I don't know, we can talk about that later, but I guess just to go over, yeah, I wanted to, I had been feeling the desire to express myself in a way that's at, you know, whatever plane of reality is considered normal by most people, like, you know, the, I guess, maybe the ego level, whatever that whole reality is. And I feel like a lot of people feel afraid even that I like can't do that, or there's just a fear because people are just, you know, people evolve differently.

And so I wanted to make, no, because I thought that this was such a destabilized time in our world that, look, I, like, I'm here to support. And that is almost, that is almost nothing to do with my work, you know, that's just something I can do at the same time, and I always have and always will. And they are, they're, you know, it's sort of a band diagram, there is some overlap, but yeah, I thought it was important to be a voice of, you know, hope and compassion.

So, yeah, sorry, go ahead.

No, no, I think that's a great summary of exactly what the post was, and that was, if it was in your intention, it clearly shined through. I mean, so let's talk about, like, moving away from the actual context of what promoted the post and we'll move away from the political stuff right now. But I would love to find out, we touched on this a little bit in the previous podcast we did together, but how, I mean, like, you, you, we spoke about this too, like, you must understand at least at this point. Now, even from last time we spoke on the podcast, that not everyone has the ability or is even aware that there are other ways of looking at this situation.

Like some of the things you wrote in the post, like, you know, talking about an ego that creates the illusion of separateness, that when you come from a heart space, you're able to, you know, enact tremendous, you know, positive effects on people, and when you look at suffering, it's hard because it makes you feel bad, but it really is the only way to do it, and it breaks down the boundaries of them versus us. Like, how did you get to the point where you're able to, a, realize that, right? That's the first step, but then also convey it in a way, whether it takes a couple of days to get it out in a difficult situation to promote it.

Like, how did you kind of get to that point? Do you know what I mean? In your life, not necessarily in this specific situation.

I guess in my life, I felt, you know, for the majority of my life, I felt very separate, you know? I haven't felt like, I mean, for a long, long time, I kind of, I felt like I just, I wasn't doing what I should be doing, and I was sort of taking a path that wasn't mine, which is very dangerous. You know, that's one of the most dangerous things you can do, and I, and that's a product of, well, yeah, my brain wasn't fully developed, I was still growing and learning, I had to go through a pretty intense amount of suffering to get to the point where I realized it was just unsustainable. And I think, yeah, I mean, even though at the time, I didn't understand what was going on, I didn't understand why I felt so separate.

I mean, looking back, that I was really the only way. And, and I had to, I had to go through that period to learn that there are other ways and tools and exercises and things that we can do in our lives to live as we should be living.

Right, I mean, and also, you know, to talk about, like no mud, no lotus. Like it's rare that you come to some level of realization about wisdom, compassion, many other good qualities that we're trying to cultivate and learn about. It's rare that you can get to those heights if you wanna refer to them that without experiencing the depths of your being. You know, there's a flip side to everything, which I think is, you know, something that is applicable right now for this country, right? Like, you don't just, it's not just like clear, smooth sailing all the time. Like the idea of Chogam Trungpa's Shambhala Society is essentially an enlightened society.

That's what Shambhala is. And, you know, we're not there, but the goal is to move towards there. And we do that by learning about ourselves and having to experience things. Like nothing cultivates compassion more than going through a situation yourself and then seeing other people going through it. I think that's what ultimately kind of provides, you know, the impetus or the desire when you see so many people being angry or upset, trying to alleviate that in whatever way you can. So that's interesting. I mean, I don't wanna probably do too much on it, but, you know, what were some of the hard times that you had experience that made you kind of feel separate?

Was it just kind of like when you were a kid, you just kind of felt different than people, or was it a specific set of situations?

Yeah, well, I guess to respond to what you were just saying.

Yeah, previous to that question. Yeah, I think that's a really interesting point that, and you can look at suffering as almost a psychedelic experience, you know? You're able, just as you are during a psychedelic experience, sort of the way that, you know, people are able to experience that. And semi-artificial stems by taking substance.

Sure.

I don't know if the right word is artificial, but it's synthetic. - Synthetic.

Yeah, or, well, yeah, it's something, so this is a very, I was talking about this on a few podcasts here. It's this idea of endo versus exo. You know, some endogenously experiencing something rather than exo outside experiencing something. So like, I can feel bliss and happiness internally if I cultivate it with no other substances, foreign substances coming in, or I can, you know, take a shitload of mushrooms and get really giddy for the first 45 minutes. You know, it's this very interesting interplay of endo versus exo that we discovered. So I know exactly what you're talking about, yeah.

But yeah, either way, yeah, that's interesting. I guess either way, when you experience that type of transcendent experience, you are able to kind of look past the idea of, you know, separateness and I think that you can feel that exact same way from suffering. And yeah, in terms of my life, yeah, it was just a general feeling like kind of a general state of not being where I should be and taking sort of the, the mask of illusion a little too far, you know. Like really just acting for years. And it reached a point where I actually had, I had like a physical reaction to it. Was sort of the breaking point where I developed panic attacks.

And so that got me, I mean, if I didn't have that, who knows, maybe I'd still be thinking that like money in the answer or, you know, these thoughts that, like I look back at myself even just four years ago or five years ago, I truly don't recognize.

Right, it's funny how that happens.

It's crazy.

I know, it's just one of those things. And then the funnier, the even funnier part when that happens is we now think like, oh, we know so much now, like this is so great. And then four years, five years later, you look back, you go, oh my God, why did I think I knew so much? I didn't know shit. It's a funny.

That's, you're lucky, you know?

Yeah.

You're not lucky in the fact five years. And you say, hey, I was pretty cool. That's a capable.

And that's a huge bummer.

Yeah, that's not a position you want to be in at all. I mean, that's this anxiety and it's funny. When this podcast comes up, this one will already be out, but I'm gonna put it out tomorrow. My guest was a clairvoyant, clair sentient, basically, you know, psychic for lack of a better word. She was from New Zealand and she grew up with a lot of these gifts and was in relative states of anxiety and uncomfortableness growing up because it's like, how do you communicate when you're like seeing things that aren't there and, you know, getting information before and you're like five to like 12 years old?

So what's funny is she ended up kind of suppressing as she went through school, some of these skills and kind of feelings and stuff that was going on, but she developed this intense anxiety at a certain point where it basically became the catalyst when she looked back is like that anxiety is what ultimately pushed her to like discover her true path and who she was and kind of like use her skills and gifts for the benefit of other people. It's a very interesting thing. Like this no mud, no lotus concept. Suffering always, there seems to be a direct correlation between suffering and cultivating aspects of your being that are spiritually important in life, you know, and they very rarely feels good as you're going through them.

I never had panic attacks per se, but I mean, I had experiences that looking back where we're not very pleasant and especially sometimes mentally unstable, but like you, you look back at those kind of quote unquote negative things and you're like, you know what, I wouldn't trade it. Like that was the thing that got me to where I am. So like, even though it was like shitty and bad, there's some, you know who I really think you should check out because I think you would resonate on a lot of levels is he's a Tibetan Buddhist teacher. His name is Minjur Rinpoche and he wrote a book called The Joy. Yeah, he's fucking awesome.

But the reason I bring him up specifically is so he is the son of a very famous Tibetan Buddhist teacher called Tuku or Jin Rinpoche. And this is like a very accomplished teacher and was one of the first to kind of like really do a lot of teachings in the West and kind of bring this stuff to light. But anyway, he was like, you know, recognized as an incarnate llama and like a special being from a very early age and got put in this monastery and all these things and he was very young, but he had crippling panic attacks. So can you imagine like being recognized as like a spiritual master and luminary, but like have panic attacks?

So like he had to learn how to face that and he used, you know, various principles and tenets of Buddhism, like meditation, these other things to kind of get around it. But he's someone who if anyone has any level of anxiety about life and suffering and all the things we're gonna have to deal with death, shitty situations, political climates, I highly recommend him because he's just got a really clear and concise way of presenting this stuff to Westerners that doesn't seem like foreign and a big concept of his is that meditation shouldn't just be viewed as like a specific set of rituals that you do.

Like theoretically, anything you're doing in life can be meditation as long as you're remembering and have the intention that it's meditation. And it's not like tricking yourself like, well, yeah, I'm gonna, you know, smoke some crack and be meditating, but it's that you can cultivate an awareness inside of yourself that serves you for the better in a way. And I specifically brought it up because anyone, if they've experienced panic attacks, I think would get a lot out of this guy. So yeah, that's interesting that you had to deal with that specific issue. I've known a few people had to deal with it.

Yeah, I mean, it was an amazing experience. It was, I mean, it literally felt like dying, you know?

Yeah.

And I think it interestingly caused a part of me that needed to die, to die.

Ego death maybe, partial ego death there.

Yeah, there is, it was a really wild time. And yeah, it's odd to look back at who that was, you know? It's pretty bizarre.

Yeah, man. Well, I mean, I will say I'm happy that you had to go through it because when it turns into who you are now, which is like a lot of people know the comedy side of you. But one of my favorite things in getting to know you and speak with you is that there's a tremendous amount of depth and multiple dimensions to who you are as a being, whoever Jay Wyngarden is, that you've constructed and presented to the world that I always enjoy, I know I shouldn't. I don't think this is how you should approach entertainers and entertainment, but I'm always very happy to hear when one of my favorite, either comedians or musicians or artists happens to be like a universally well-liked and like good person, you know what I mean?

And thoughtful person, like nothing warms my heart more when I've had the pleasure of interviewing people who knew Stevie Wonder personally to be like, yeah, he's legit, like just how you think he would be in real life, like that's how he is. He's like a completely smart, courageous, empathetic, wonderful, compassionate being. And I'm like, oh good. 'Cause you don't wanna hear that they're not this way. So I bring this up also 'cause I think the best comedy stems, regardless of what the actual comedy looks like, like the final product, it stems from a place that's very deep within people because it requires looking at situations and figuring out how to put that in a way that even if it's tragic and sad, is still gonna allow people to kind of like get out of that zone of like sadness, which is why when you were talking before like how it's hard for you, you basically find it impossible when you're in like a depressed mood to do comedy.

Like I don't find that hard to believe, you know what I mean? Because you have to kind of get in tune with the aspect of yourself that is gonna provide levity and how are you supposed to do that if you're not feeling like that in some way. So I'm always happy to hear and see when people have this kind of like depth to them that regardless of what they're putting out there, now shines through.

Yeah, thanks. Yeah, you said some really nice stuff. (laughing) We don't think I'm universally like, I mean, I know that there's some really, really nice people who support me, but I also think I like can scare some people and I don't necessarily mind that. Although, I mean, I guess naturally it's nice to, it's a more gratifying experience at the senses level, just to have sort of a nice interaction. At the same time, I'm not. I understand why people might get afraid. And I, yeah, I accept that.

Why might they?

Because I guess what I do challenge is a lot of traditional values and, I mean, it can be seen as a threat. I mean, it's like at this weird, deep, practical level of survival. And that's okay, you know?

It's good. I mean, I think there's a function there that needs to be examined. You know what I mean? Like when you present people with things that don't fit within the cultural norm of what people are used to seeing that can be kind of a uncomfortable experience or threatening experience, but ultimately it obviously shouldn't be. And I mean, I think part of what you can do is put the lens on something and kind of exacerbate or characterize a certain situation. And that gives it a level like, you know, our buddy Vic is amazing at this. And Vic, I mean, I don't know if you know this, the exact same thing happened.

I had Vic scheduled last week for Friday and he hit me up the day before. And he's like, listen, man, I'm like, I'm pretty bummed about this. I don't want to go on, you know, the podcast and just be like negative. That's not who I am. And like we had a long conversation. I was giving him some tips on like how to be mindful 'cause he was saying he was getting angry. And I'm like, dude, just like, whenever you get angry, it's okay to be angry. Just like note in your head that you're getting angry. But, you know, why bring Vic up is like, he does this thing where he's distorting reality only a little bit, but then amplifying that little distortion in a way that kind of makes people laugh and realize how crazy this is.

But also really examine like, this is someone who actually did that thing. These are these comedy things. And even with yours, it's based on kernels of truth. It's not totally made up shit, you know what I mean? Like there is a weirdness and kind of a bizarreness to it at times, but it still is a mirror ultimately that reflects back fundamental truths of people. I mean, I think that's what art, comedy, all of this stuff is like we're building mirrors in which to reflect back something at the audience and ourselves. So I mean, I understand why people would find it threatening. I obviously don't, I think it's amazing.

But okay, I want to shift gears a little bit because I was really excited to see this. You're coming to my town in DC and on the East Coast. Can you tell me a little bit about this tour you're about to go on, what? In a few days, right, Friday?

Yeah, I'm leaving on Friday and I'll be going to Edmonton to meet up with my friend Cole Cush, a really brilliant animator. Has he done the podcast or no?

No, I would love to have him on him. He did the animation for, yeah, yeah, he's awesome.

He's an amazing guy and we're gonna be driving with the band Walter TV to Toronto and yeah, great, awesome band. I'm really, really excited to spend a bunch of time with these guys and we'll be meeting with Mikey as well and going to a whole bunch of cities in Canada and the United States, the Northeast. So yeah, I'm very excited. I guess if you live in that area, maybe check it out see if you can stop by and we'll get to talk for a bit.

Yeah, I'm gonna put links up to the tour and all the places you're gonna be so people can check it out. Have you done a tour like this by yourself? I'm not by yourself, but have you done this before?

Yeah, I've done, I did one that was called the Brath Out Loud Tour is-

Oh yeah, yeah.

Saf Brath's first sort of his track actually from the age of 21 to, I believe 21 probably because he graduated from Northwestern and then he moved to Los Angeles, I believe, although I actually don't know that. But think he lives in Los Angeles, Madison's, we drove from Los Angeles to Chicago. So it's called the Brath Out Loud Tour. And actually at one of the places they thought Zach Rap was coming. So that was, but we still love the show. Actually, another place to give you a good, maybe example of your question from earlier.

Yeah.

Of like people who are just like, Mary just truly cannot process what I do.

Yeah, yeah, my work at all, a guy came up to me in Denver and asked me on that tour, he asked me if somebody put me up to my set. Like, you know, paid by some guy who was enemies or something, like it was unbelievable. So yeah, a lot of weird things like that happen every once in a while and it's pretty interesting. And, but yeah, I really appreciate a lot of people who are able to sort of look at a different level, approach life, maybe a little differently. And yeah, there's some really, really, I've met some really great people.

What, that's really funny. That's all I've done. It was like an anemipe. It's like a smear campaign of Zach Rap, the Brath, that's really funny.

Yeah, it's so bizarre.

Thanks, that's such a weird thought to have. And then express to the person. Yeah.

It's so cute.

It's my life, man. I mean, what's it like, I mean, I always wonder what it's like getting up on stage, doing any form of comedy to people. Like, what is it like for you when you get on stage, knowing that you're also like, you know, there's a character there. It's not just you, J. Winegarten's perspectives on the world said in monologue form. Like, what do you do to kind of get ready for that? What's the experience like? And, you know, is it enjoyable? Is it fun? And I know there's various emotions and feelings based on how a set is going and how a crowd is. But what's the actual process like for you?

Well, yeah, to be honest with you, one of the main reasons I started comedy, I mean, to me comedy, I don't think I'm like really a comedian. Like, comedy is more of an exercise way, like I use it as a tool. And I use different, I do different, like, experiences or create different things as just really as tools for myself. And so, and the truth is, yeah, when I first started, I was, or when I was thinking about starting, I was really just nervous because I had zero experience with anything in terms of entertainment. I mean, truly, I was on a path, you know, to become like a doctor and stuff for a while.

Wow, wow.

And stuff.

Yeah, and I, that's what I thought I wanted to do. I didn't know, and I was like, maybe a lawyer. I just didn't--

Sure.

And not truly nothing I did when I was younger, ever connected with me, except for, you know, truly loved and still loved college football. So I think it like didn't probably, honestly, I think I would be like a great, I could be a great football coach.

Who's your college, who's your favorite college team?

Well, I went to USC, so USC, I mean, yeah.

Pretty Asian man.

Sweet, I had a great win over UCLA a couple days ago. But anyways, yeah, I mean, I just didn't feel connected to anything, like what are we talking about again? I keep getting lost.

You know, it's funny is I have this effect, I think, on people because sometimes I just go on tangents. We were talking about, now you've lost me, Jay. You're confusion has confused me. I think we were talking, you were talking about what connected with you when you were younger, what the experience of comedy was like, how you would get nervous doing it, how you use it as tools.

Yeah, yeah, I had very little experience, but I did, like, and I'd say the only other thing I ever liked doing in school, ever, was PowerPoints. And I was doing PowerPoints, you know, from the time I was like very young, and doing them all the time, and I would do like school plays for my parents, and, or not school plays, like little plays at home. And that was really it. Like, I would have, and then I did like, class videos once in a while. And somehow I didn't understand, I wasn't ready to understand that I should do the exact thing that was the only thing that gave me a source of joy, you know?

It's like, yeah, but that doesn't give you money, or, you know, I had all these--

Right.

Excuse me, excuses. So then, anyways, when I started comedy, after I hit a point where I was like, okay, this pack was definitely not who I am, and it was wrong, it would be wrong to do.

Right.

Then, yeah, I started comedy, I was very nervous. I, and I just sort of, I did it. Like, my early material was so terrible, I was just like, you know, very, like traditional stand-up, it was just like, I just did whatever was the easiest possible thing to achieve having done stand-up comedy. You know, like, because, and like, honestly, the rush I got from the first few sets was, I mean, I'll never hit that level again.

Really?

Yeah.

It's unbelievable. So, and, you know, that was to get, like, no laughs. It was just the idea of being on stage, holding a microphone.

Right.

It was incredible.

Right.

So, yeah, and now, as I do comedy longer, I'm losing my desire. I have almost no desire to do live comedy. I really don't, yeah, like, I get it. And the idea of, like, received, and, yeah, honestly, the idea of comedy does feel like, of live comedy feels like slightly dangerous in just the whole soul of, like, getting immediate gratification, like, getting, there being a goal and sort of an extended-based way of looking at life. It feels, it feels like easy and wrong in some ways. That's when I'm, things in a very cynical and negative way. The truth is, I'll be doing the practice on this tour and I do certain things about it.

And I really like when it's able to, like, turn people on, you know, and have this light up maybe in way. And that's honestly the only reason I ever do it is because I saw things when I was younger. Specifically, I had a moment watching the Stella Shorts when I was a teen and it really, it was like one of the most incredible experiences I've ever had and feeling of being, you know, just turned on to something new.

Yes, I did. - And that I do know, and yeah, that's, the only reason I do it now is just in hopes that maybe it's like, you know, passing out a line and maybe there'll be some people out there who get that same feeling. That's the goal.

I mean, that's-- - I don't really, I don't like the idea of like, I am attached to the results of this joke. Like, to me, I don't know. That seems like, it's just, it's not really for me. And what I wanna do is do, all I care about doing is doing things that no one has ever tried before and hopefully those types of things will turn some people on.

See, I mean-- - I knew it.

This is ultimately why I think you have a very good chance of being successful because there's something that you've been touching on throughout this entire conversation, which I think I do not wanna be lost. I doubt it will be, but it's this concept of Joseph Campbell's kind of answering the call, following your own bliss, regardless of what the situations look like external, the factors that say this isn't a good idea, but actually going with what really feels right in a lot of ways, even if, like I said, logically, it's not even what you're doing. That's hugely important. I also, I mean, I wanna delve into this still live.

I mean, when you're talking about live comedy, are you talking also as like kind of a juxtaposition with like, you know, more like two wet crew stuff and kind of post-production comedy? Is that something you enjoy more, or is like, what's your kind of, what do you love doing right now, comedically? I mean, tons of stuff. Like, I have so many different ideas right now that I, it's crazy, and I'm working on a movie, and a book, and like a calendar, and all these different problems. Like, there's so much I wanna get made, but mostly, yeah, I'm just, I mean, in terms of live stuff, like, I'm much more interested now in a collaboration, like what you were saying.

Like, to at least take the ego out of it as much as possible, you know? Like, I'm doing it in this new tour, I'll be going with Cole, Cole Cush, and doing this new experience. It's gonna be pretty, I hope, entertaining to watch. It's, I don't know if I'm like, what exactly? Because it's, yeah, I guess we just wanna try it out first, but you can come to those states of the Northeast, maybe check it out, and I think, yeah, collaboration, this feels a little better to me, but beyond that, I think I'm more interested in creating media, and things that can be consistent at home or whatever, rather than live, because I think that's, it's not even really, that's not really, yeah, my true passion or anything.

I mean, it's awesome that you seem to be able to, and I'm sure it's not as easy as I'm about to make it sound, but it seems, it's really awesome that you can kind of get in tune with what makes you happy. I think people have a lot of trouble with that, right? I mean, I know it, myself included at times, but it's, you set yourself up for a much better life when you respond to that call, when you follow the things, and I loved what you said about kind of the instant gratification, X plus Y equals Z formula, not, I mean, I'm sure, just like me, you love tons of stand-up and tons of things, but you know for yourself that that's not something that payoff expectation thing isn't something you're interested in doing, and I also like that like, another thing that I don't think you've explicitly said, but I mean, you did in some ways, but when you're creating things, you're trying to not wake people up, but have people resonate with your particular perspective or a way of looking at things, and I think ultimately that's the function of all creativity, right?

It's to get things to, it's like when you ring a bell, you know, if there's other bells around, they start vibrating and ringing too, and that's kind of what we do with art and creativity and all of these things, and I'm just like, I'm excited to see what you come up with in the next, you know, months and years, because I think that is what's lacking a lot in the creative world because of kind of commoditization and commercialization of entertainment, you know, so many things are derivative, and I don't use that exclusively in a pejorative sense, like, you know, some things are good that they are like other things, but when there's a level of originality that also is in tune with kind of the depth or understanding or intention, I think that's when, like, really awesome shit starts to happen, and I know, like, when we're having this conversation, you're not, like, blowing up as an individual, but I would be surprised if you didn't, in some way.

You know, like--

I really think you'd never do that.

I mean, you don't know. There's a thing you just don't--

No, I really don't.

You may not--

That's far.

Yeah, no, that's my point, and when I say blowing up as an individual, it doesn't mean like you have access. You might be surprised to find, at some point in your life, you have a pretty good access to mass consciousness, because I think, and especially if it's not your intention, do you know what I mean? Like, there's this weird thing that I've noticed in life with a lot of people I know, including myself, where when you just kind of start operating from a very open and honest place, shit starts to happen, and it doesn't mean like all your desires are fulfilled, and all of a sudden you're super successful and everything is great, but the relationships you tend to form with people end up benefiting you down the line.

When your main operating system is to help people, you know, stuff starts to flow, like there's-- I just think that, and I also think like, you're on to something here with comedy as the vehicle that is helping people, and I think it's a necessary antidote. Like, a lot of people, you know, kind of complete the circle here with this Trump stuff, like, you know, they don't want-- it's hard for people to kind of see a way out of the anger and the fear, and it's up to people like you, not to put the pressure on it, but like, you know, to give them other ways to engage with the world, to give them other alternatives that maybe aren't familiar or maybe aren't the narrative they're used to telling themselves, but that kind of plucked them up, because like, you know, imagine this scenario, like, let's say someone watches something that you've done, and then they hear this podcast.

They're gonna have a tremendous insight into the wise and the reasons for you doing this, and I think that that's a powerful thing, so I wouldn't want any of that to get lost that, you know, the deeper part of your attention, and I think it's really healthy that you're not putting up, like, I need all these people to be watching my stuff and doing my things, and I need to be super successful to be happy, because that's impossible. If that's your mindset, you're never gonna be happy, right? That's like all these famous people, you know, who are extremely rich, have millions of fans are just, they're not happy a lot of the time, because they've set up an external goal for their happiness, rather than following what actually makes them happy and enjoying the process along the way.

So in a lot of ways, you know, like, I'm sure you realize this, you already are very successful in that sense.

Well, thank you. I mean, I think you are as well. I mean, a lot of what you were saying really applies to you. I think the fact that you're putting out, so really eye-opening content at your network. I mean, I think that's an incredible thing to do.

And try, yeah.

Thank you, and release it, it's really important stuff, and you're doing great work.

Thanks, man, I appreciate it. I mean, I really, it's a weird time in this point in history and where we are to be very optimistic about the future, but I'm incredibly optimistic about a lot of things, not because I'm delusional, but because I just continuously meet people who get it for lack of a better term, who just get it. Like, they get why we're here. They get what this is about. They get that, like you said in your piece, that we're vehicles for each other's transformation. That's our function, and that we're fundamentally not different from those people. So, I mean, I love it, let me ask you this, I gotta put Eli to bed over here soon, but did we do the color number, animal thing last time we spoke, or was that before I was doing that?

I don't think we did that.

Okay, cool, so I'm gonna ask you three questions, and then we're gonna wrap it up. So, what is your favorite color?

Blue.

Nice, mine too. What is your favorite number?

31.

Oh, that's interesting, why 31?

I don't know, I just like it.

It's cool, my favorite number's 13, the reverse of that. What is your favorite animal?

The dog, definitely.

Mm-hmm, that's awesome, man. And I'm sorry that you have to leave the baby for your tour, but absence makes the heart grow fonder for both of you.

Yeah.

I'm very excited, I think there's cameras that are available at the place where she'll be watched, so I don't think we-- - That's so awesome.

Yeah, that's awesome.

Can't wait to see it.

Before we wrap up, I have done the practical tip with you, so we're not gonna do that. Is there anything you wanna say, anything you wanted that we didn't cover?

I don't know, I mean, I guess, did you have any other questions, last questions?

I didn't, I just wanna say that I very much enjoy having these conversations. I am sure I'm not the only one. Many people listening, I'd like to keep doing these, because I think you're not only a very funny and cool guy, but your perspective on a lot of different things, I think is a valuable voice for people to hear on a regular basis, so I'd love to continue doing these, man.

Yeah, I would love to, as well, I don't think I made too many people laugh today. Definitely not as the laugh leaders.

Yeah, you're gonna need to get that, maybe you can do a PowerPoint that we can share with people, and I mean, as always, man, I'm gonna link to all of the things that I've been coming out from, to Egg Crew and anything else you want me to put up there, because this was a more, I don't wanna say serious, conversation was more kind of like an exploration of your consciousness, but I do not wanna be lost just how fucking hilarious you are and some of the shit you're working on, so it's not your function to be hilarious all of the time.

Thank you, actually, do you hear that sound in the background? It's the baby eating, which is kind of like an ASMR thing, so I'll put my computer close to her, listen to this. Hold on one sec. (laughs)

You hear that?

I did hear it. What kind of food do you give the baby?

Honestly, I don't really know. Yeah, I'm not sure, but I would like to give her better food, so if you have any, really, it doesn't matter, honestly, it doesn't matter at all, but if you do wanna shirt or something, then I have a new e-store that's available. J. One, Garten, e-store, I believe that, I don't actually don't know that much.

I'm gonna have a link to it, don't worry.

But yeah, it honestly doesn't matter, like, truly, but if you happen to need a shirt or something, then I would, yeah, you could buy it and it's pretty nice soft shirt. You can sleep in it or wear it anytime, and baby, you will get better food if you do that. (laughs)

You know, I didn't even mean that like that because I'll get her better food no matter what. (laughs)

I believe that, man, that's really, I'll tell you, my poor dog, I got him when I was a vegan, I'm not a vegan anymore, and so we started him on vegan dog food, and he still eats that to this day, the poor bastard. Yeah, he, I mean, the thing is, is like, we're not cruel, but every time we try to feed him something else, he like poops funny, and so we just keep him on the vegan stuff and he likes it. I mean, he will give him tons of other stuff like throughout the day, just like scraps and people food, but yeah, he's on vegan, it's halo. I think Ellen, Ellen has the company. They make non-vegan dog food too, the same company, halo.

But the store thing, dude, totally putting a link up, I am going to absolutely encourage people to get this stuff. It's really funny, it's really cool. Dude, there's eat, there's-- Mouse pads, mouse pads, right? Mouse pads, you know, there's magnets, there's pins, all sorts of different little just fun images that you can have, not, it's very not super expensive, but also not a big deal at all. So anyways, it's just something to check out if you want. Also, you can just go to my website, jyongarden.force, which is just an overall hub where you can go to the store, you can go watch videos, to a crew, you know, all sorts of fun stuff.

So, but overall, yeah, thank you so much for listening and thank you, Noah, for doing all of your amazing work. Yeah, I really appreciate it. Dude, it's my pleasure and seriously, thank you for coming on. Good luck on the tour. I will see you on the tour when you come to DC. So, man, thanks again. And I don't know if we're going to DC anymore, we're going to Baltimore. Oh, Baltimore, that's 45 minutes away, it's not too far, not too far at all. All right. Cool, man, thanks so much for doing this and we'll talk soon. Okay, I'll talk to you later. All right, peace, man. Bye. (gentle music) (gentle music)

♪ Who likes dream boss, we like dream boss ♪ ♪ Who likes dream boss, we like dream boss ♪ That's my acapella dream bar ad. Guys, eatdreamb.com/sync. Go get some delicious dream bars. There's three flavors. There's not just the apple chamomile that I like. There's the tart cherry lemon balm. There's the banana lavender. Check it out. Like I said, get your dream boss today at eatdreamb.com. This is why I get paid the big bucks, guys. Thank you, Jay, for coming on. Thank you for listening to this episode. A reminder, you can subscribe to this podcast if you enjoy it. You can rate and review it, which helps the podcast grow.

You can donate if you feel obliged to do so. Or you can just keep listening and tell your friends. That's always a fun thing to do. Got some really fun guests coming up for you until next week. Bye-bye.